Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Broke Down and Burned Out

I've been thinking a lot about those feelings I've had lately of needing to get away from it all, and feeling like a recluse half the time; wishing I had some secret spot to go where I could just be chilled out with my thoughts... Lately, just about everything has been getting on my nerves or draining me of all my physical and emotional energy. I'm seriously starting to wonder, am I officially "Burned Out"?

So, I googled "Burned Out" and found numerous pages describing the symptoms of it, and comparisons between Stress and just being Burned Out... I couldn't tell for sure, so I took the blogthings quiz... It tells me:

You Are 93% Burned Out

You are extremely burned out.
You work too hard, and you're not getting the results you deserve.
It's time for a life change, as soon as you can manage it.
You're giving away most of your energy to something you don't even enjoy.
Are You Burned Out?

Anyway, what can you truly do when you are trapped under financial burdens and responsibilities that keep you caught up in the 'wheel', and it just won't quit moving long enough for you to hop off and catch your breath?? Is there any hope?

Do any of you ever just wish you could just file bankruptcy, clear the slate and just start clean? I don't think I could let myself do anything like that... It's just too scary, I don't want to lose what I do have although I see people around me who have like... Nothing, and they seem to be happier and tons more stress-free.

I would love to have time to spend with my family, relax, paint, work on my music... just "whatever" and not feel the terrible urgency that I have to get back because I have to do 'this' or 'that'. Hey and I know that it's "Life" but it just didn't always feel this way... there was a time when things were somewhat trouble-free, and there seemed to be at least something to look forward to.

Should I try Yoga?

Should I try Holy Water?

Therapy?

Should I Run away?? What???

Excuse me while I go and scream (that is if I can find a quiet place to go scream).

8 comments:

Blublood said...

ya know I completely understand where you may be in your life right now. I was there a while back and trust me I came to realize that the more you have the more you have.....HA! It means more responsiblities more trouble more decisions, more of everything. Whether those things be good or bad is up to you.

Just hang in there and don't be afraid to simplify things a lil'.....

Just like I said I was doing....Just takin' out the trash....

Later AJ.....

Blu

ZigZagMan said...

Buddy...I don't know if it helps, but coming from somebody who has been more or less unemployed since feb...jumping off the wheel without a plan isn't all it's cracked up to be..:)

When is the last time you took a real vacation lass?? Just you and your man? Even for just a long weekend?

Aunt Jackie said...

Thanks Blu. I want things to be simple, but I need what I have. :)
It's life's puzzle that can't be solved.

Zig, I know you're right, I've been in the unemployment line before and was so thankful to get my job. I don't want to lose it--it's a great gig... It's just probably I need a solid week on an island or in the mountains! :)

Sara said...

Yoga is the answer AJ. Grounding, reflective, peaceful, gives you the chance to escape from your thoughts for a little bit of time. In addition, the hills/mountains work wonders too..and maybe a little meditation to add to the healing..Go for it girl! Do these things and I can tell you, through experience, you'll feel a whole lot better. Much love to you xxxx

her indoors said...

got three frieds who have all filed for bankcrupcy this year, two of them are fine the third one has just found other things to worry about.

you need a break, head off somewhere at the spur of the moment just do it.
(((hugs))) to you AJ

Chalice said...

AJ... I would have to say that I was in this position for years and it was extremely depressing. For a long time the only thing that kept me going was my son because everything else around me was pretty bad. Money. Work. I was drained. It sucked.

But things have gotten better especially since Blu came into my life. AT first we struggled financially but he made me happy as I did him. Now things are coming along in that department and life is good. In fact, its more than good.

They say all things happen for a reason and I truly believe it. Now I will use a movie line, "That which does not kill us only makes us stronger..." (Steel Magnolias). Anymore, I am that stronger person but it took a lot of work.

Sorry about going off on a tangent here but I know what you are feeling and as hard as it is, just remember there is always light at the end of the tunnel and one day that light will come blazing through....

Not-So-Naughty Voyeur said...

Hang in there kiddo. Keep plugging away, I've just accepted that's the meaning to life. Putting up with all of the shit and chaos.. waiting for it all to get better. I don't know. Just be strong and don't let it get to you. It really could be worse. It could always be worse. I went to a funeral today, he is 6 feet under now. I'd rather still be fighting the good fight..

FOUR DINNERS said...

I got 100%. Another drink'll sort it