Friday, February 01, 2008

We've Got A Lot Of Living To Do

I don't have the time right this second to go back to each post and reply on all comments you guys have left me since my Dad has been in the hospital, but I will address you right here in post. The kindness, and thoughts that you've all shown truly amaze me. Just when I lose most of my faith in the Human Race as a whole, I am floored to know such wonderful big-hearted people. All of you have taken time to send me e-mails, leave me comments and also have me in your thoughts and prayers (where applicable), and I want you to know that it has meant the world to me and made all the difference to my family. You're the Whipped Cream at the top of my Starbucks White Chocolate Mocha... lol

So, Wow! This has been quite a tiring week, and we've been wrapped up in our own little world being in and out of the I.C.U. with Daddy. Still, all the time I'm sorely aware that life goes on and our responsibilities don't just fade away because of our little wrinkle in time... I've been stressing a bit over worrying about not being at work to take care of my usual responsibilities. However, I know that Family is the most important thing, so I am trying to concentrate on that, and hold faith that I am always doing the right thing, because I am following my gut, doing what I feel is right... that's all we have in this lifetime folks... Our gut instinct. It's that little urge you have, or "inner voice" telling you what feels right, and what you should do. It's your higher self, listen to it. You know everything, and you have all the right answers, but you just have to look deep within yourself, and you have to realize them... that's all. It takes quiet time, and it takes fine tuning, and the ability to get deep (that combined usually with your chemical of choice--lol, j/k) Well, mostly... ha-ha.

No matter what happens, or what you're going through, the world continues to turn, and you're still running against the wind. You have to make THE MOST out of every second, every day... Just don't have any regrets. Whether that is reuniting with someone who you've had a disagreement with, or whether it is making up your very own "Things to do before I kick the Bucket" list (like the movie), or just spending time, taking the time to spread a little joy into the lives of those you love (like helping your family, or spending time with loved ones). Just do it... You don't know if you'll get the chance ever again. Opportunity can be a bitch, and it may or may not knock again... Seriously, whatever it is, do it... FOLLOW YOUR HEART (gut, intuition, etc).

I've made a lot of realizations and a great deal of spiritual progress (inner me stuff) lately... It's odd, just little things, I don't know if I will really go into them in detail. I may little by little, here or there... share a few of them with you. If I feel driven to do so... not tonight though, I am too tired and I only want to relax now and catch a few winks of shut-eye.

Before I do, I'll leave you with two things. First, an update on my Dad:

Cantankerous is not the word for Daddy... If you'd ever been his nurse, or doctor, aid or anything in the hospital environment, you would be fully ready to pass on and find yourself in the depths of hell (probably). He's just that rotten. Never has been a good patient anyways, but he makes them work for their paycheck and probably makes them second guess going in for their next shift. Still the people at the hospital he is in have been nothing but patient, and just as helpful as they could be.

Dad's cat scans continue to show no changes. This means no real improvement in his brain activity or the bleeding hasn't really stopped, but it has not worsened, and he's been doing o.k. So they scheduled him for an MRI tonight, which should show us more detail, and maybe give us the root of the problem there. Hopefully he will heal up, totally, and get a little physical therapy. They want to be sure he is able to get around and has functionality where he should, I assume. Then once they're satisfied he should hopefully get to come home soon. We're not given a day yet since they're still not sure about it all, but they're working on it. He's an old truck driver, probably just needs an oil change... right??

All in all, I think on how he just turned 80 years old in August and how many surgeries, mishaps and illness-related incidents he's survived, and he's still hanging in there... The world is a mystery, and we've been lucky so far. I tell him jokingly that he's "tougher than a mule's butt". Really the worst part of it all is how angry he's been getting at the fact that he can't come home yet. He's been yelling at people and acting agitated, which gets his blood pressure up, and that's not good. I try to help him calm down but he is who he is... but he's Dad. Guess he'll never change... Just hope Mom can stay strong through all this and get her strength back. She can't stop no matter how sick she is, but he never can realize that. Everyone send her your positive thoughts and prayers while your at it too, she could use all she can get... Once again thanks!!!

Lastly, I will leave you with this. They say that all guitar players usually start out with "Smoke on the Water", right? Just for some odd reason, it's the first song many people learn to play on guitar, etc... Hell I can even play it on Piano, but it is a simple song. I am a human jukebox though. However, this is quite a different slant on Smoke on the Water... All the way from the Orient, I bring you... Smoke on the Yangtze!!! LOL Enjoy!


Jay said...

Well thank goodness his situation isn't getting worse. Hopefully he'll being to improve now and get back home quickly.

katy said...

Hope you managed to get some rest A Jackie, of course I will send prayers and thoughts out to your Mum and continue sending them to your dad and yourself too.
hope the MRI goes well and that he will be home soon x

Further on up the road said...

Don't worry too much about Dad - I know easier said than done. But he is the place where all the attention is on him. Think of you, your family and especially your Mum. There isn't anyone being paid to look after you lot - so you have to do it yourselves.

Loads of hugs and best wishes in what can only be the most harrowing of times.

Smoke on the Water - hell my son even learnt it and he hates Deep Purple. But being a geek I have to open the debate - did Richie use a pick or fingers?

R.E.H. said...

Glad to hear he's not any worse though. Let's hope that catscan brings further good news.

Take care, and get some much needed sleep.

BBC said...

I'm analytical about death and accept that it is going to happen. But I think that we are all omnipresent so it isn't any big deal. Just shedding one body for a fresh one.

Yup, I've done a lot of living, a whole lot, and still going on but slowing down.

I think that my dying will be the last interesting thing I blog about. That should be an interesting subject.

As long as I can't get out of dying I may as well make it interesting.

Tell Dad to be good to those trying to help him. I wouldn't think of giving those trying to help me a bad time, I appreciate them trying to help me.

It's good that you love your parents, I didn't think much of mine. They sucked as parents.

Hang in there, things will be fine.


We're all here babe. Be strong 'n he'll be fine xx

g-man said...

I'll keep with the positive mojo. Glad tit is not getting worse, and glad he is getting treatment.

Great video, I had it cranked. :) Get some rest.

Joshua said...

I'm not good with dem der words.

But I will wish you and your family the best of luck.

Speedcat Hollydale said...

Yes, a family health emergency is rough, I wish the best to you and your father :)
I have been through similar circumstances in the last year, and they really do make one think, and realize just what is really important in life.
Time lost is just that, and I try to make the most of it.

Take care Jackie,

Joel said...

Oh yes, we must make THE MOST of every second and that just caught me. Hope things turn out fine