Friday, February 06, 2009

Sweatin The Oldies

“I love mankind; it's people I can't stand.” ~Charles M. Schulz quotes (American cartoonist, 1922-2000)

Lord knows I myself am no longer what you might call "A Spring Chicken". So when I go on rants about people's ages, and appropriate dress in certain settings, please, please nobody take it to heart. I am also no "Skinny Chicken", so take the weight-related comments with a grain of salt as well! Although everyone should be themselves, and enjoy life, and live the way they see fit, I still feel that there are some "common sense" rules about how to carry oneself publicly. It's about knowing what people should have to look at, and about looking like a fool.

You probably wonder why I even pay attention to people, but it's just me. I'm a people watcher, I like to observe others' behaviors, odd and annoying habits. Gives me something to do while I am listening intently to my eclectic music playlist.

"Aging Tennis Diva"
Well, you should probably recall this lady from my gym-rants just the other day. This morning, however, she had ditched the vulgarity of her tennis skirt and too-short Lycra for the standard "athletic shorts" (still quite short), but this time she didn't spend as much time digging out her assets. The only complaint I really had about her this morning was that she went to one Treadmill, hiked her leg up on the arms, spreading her shoe-soul germs all over it, did her stretches, and then deserted that machine for the one directly next to it. She didn't even wipe it off. I know, I know, this isn't the biggest crime in the world, it could be worse.

Then as she began her morning run on the treadmill, she ripped off her over-sized tee in order to show her stretchy Lycra clingy top. She wasn't the worst dressed lady of course, and I applaud the not being ashamed of your body vibe. Nothing wrong with being proud to be fit, one can go too far though.

Like this next lady...

"Gutsy Grandma"
This lady had the fluffy, pulled up curly 'Jewish Woman from New Jersey' hair-do. She wore a very skimpy, Lycra sports bra with no shirt. She had on a pair of very fitting athletic pants, and although I can't zing her for wearing anything too short, they were definitely revealing in their tightness. The worst part is she is just deep into her elliptical workout, and her entire flabby midsection is rolling right along with her, heaving out of her tight sports bra and youthful athletic pants.

The woman was not overweight or anything, but she still had a sagging midsection. These are body areas that might be hard to tighten, but in my opinion, if you don't got it, then PLEASE don't flaunt it. You're just embarrassing yourself, and I wouldn't lay my guts out on the line for all to see. Keep it at home, and when you are in public, save the rest of our eyes!

"Steroid Steve"
I've been watching 'Steroid Steve' for a couple of days now. He's one of those guys who's possibly a power lifter. His upper body is all musclebound and meaty, and then he has little noodle legs that are severely overlooked, and lacking. These are usually the guys that do the 'Ogre War Grunt' when lifting, to ensure that everyone else notices them. They usually have no inside voice whatsoever, and sport terrible manners.

Well, I'm enjoying my cardio, and listening to my music when all of a sudden, Steroid Steve blusters up from the back row, and as loud as possible, he screams at someone he knows up front, "COME ON, GET THE LEAD OUT UP THERE! LET'S GO!!!"

I promptly jerk my neck to the back-right, and glare at Steroid Steve, wondering why he finds it necessary to make so much noise this early in the morning. I wasn't the only one with a twisted neck. He does this a couple more times, when I'm tempted to jump off and stomp the living testosterone out of him. I mean, my volume will only go up so loud. Finally, SS finished his little workout and tromped on down the isle. He's only in addition to the usual annoying people who just sit at side-by-side machines, and barely work out, only to use their time to socialize, and carry on annoying conversations. This is just as distracting.

I just wish people would all work-out, and keep it on the down.

It's a thrill a minute, I swear... but I do enjoy my workouts early in the morning, because it gives me so much energy and makes me feel good the rest of the day. Plus that early morning fat burn (before you eat even a morsel) burns off nothing but pure body fat, and boosts your metabolism all day long. Can't beat that!

Anyway, I haven't had any other really interesting things going on this week, basically just work and trying to get things done. As I said before though, guess I'll be at Mom's tonight as it's only two or three of us pulling shifts at home, and I'll be taking in the comedy stylings of "Cheech and Chong" tomorrow night. I'll report on these happenings, I am sure.

Also, if you haven't checked by in a while, visit the sites that I contribue to: I Miss My Childhood, and WTF Friday. ~Happy Weekend!!~


Chelly said...

I love these workout posts Jax. Great quote by Schulz, by the way.

Enjoy Cheech and Chong tomorrow! Have a fun weekend Jackie. :)

Reb said...

I can maybe, just maybe, understand wearing tights etc while working out. What I can't understand is dressing like that at work or just out shopping! Things hanging out or encased like sausages, 50+ women dressing like teens. I am no spring chicken or skinny minnie, so I really have no room to talk about peoples body types or ages, but jeebus people, the rest of us have to look at you. Have a little decency.

Loved Cheech & Chong way back when, I am sure they haven't lost it. (yes, I am that old;) Enjoy.

Jay said...

My favorite gym person is the Suzie Show Off. ;-)

The Preacherman said...

I love excercising in the gym.

I can literally sit and watch it for hours......;-)