Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Today is OK

It's... you guessed it: My Wednesday Post. Today is just "ok". I'm not fueled up about anything in particular, although I'm sweaty from walking at lunchtime, and the bottoms of my feet are slightly sore because we did all that walking when I was only wearing flip-flops. Flip flops don't travel well on the cobble stone of Main street... but that's "ok".

It's Wednesday and "Things" are "Ok".

We started out heading South on Main with full intentions of hitting up The Arcade Restaurant, Memphis' Oldest Cafe (1919). It's down in the South Main district downtown, and can boast involvement in some movie filming, and patronage from many celebs, having served the likes of Cybill Shepherd, Robert Duvall, Dennis Quaid, Susan Sarandon, Rufus Thomas, Elvis and his buddies, and many others, as well. If you're ever in Memphis, and you have the time, I highly suggest popping in, even if just for the history and the memorabilia. The food there is pretty "OK".

But as Murphy's law would have it, it's a very long sweaty walk, and everyone gave up due to the fact that no Trolleys were in sight headed South. Funny how there were at least ten of them going North, since we were not. Therefore, our journey took a turn right about Union Avenue, where we made a left and decided to hit up Huey's! (Home of Blue, Brews and Burgers since 1970). Word has it that Elvis (a.k.a. "Big E") enjoyed Huey's too.

We hopped in, found a seat, I grabbed a Memphis Flyer, and caught up on all of the local goings on, while we waited. I ordered the Veggie Burger, and of course my favorite refreshing drink "Un-Sweetened Iced Tea".

Magically, nobody screwed up my tea accidentally filling it with sugar, and my food order was correct. I'm not saying Huey's screws things up, I'm saying I usually end up with that sort of luck. So we all kick back for a relaxing lunch. Afterwards, one of my co-workers, demonstrates the proper way to 'shoot a toothpick into the ceiling'. Now, let me give you a bit of background here. Huey's (another must try place if you're in the Memphis-area), has a couple of little "traditions". You can write on the walls, and shoot your toothpicks into the ceiling. Occasionally, they will have a contest to see if you can "guess how many toothpicks", and the winner gets a prize of some sort. So you see? More fun and entertainment. Huey's is also within close walking distance of historic Beale Street, so if you eat there, you can go and have a nice digestive walk afterwards and see the sights.

Our demonstrator quickly landed his toothpick into the ceiling, and then I, having followed his instructions to the tee made a successful blow as well! We took the "long way" back, as I stated above, a nice long walk in the wrong shoes, and the wrong attire for comfort and coolness, but once again that's "OK". Now I'm sitting in front of my little fan, jamming out my thoughts for the day so I can concentrate on some work. Still, I wish I had a personal vat of unsweetened iced tea in my cubicle (that would be refreshing and convenient, and I think would make me greatly productive too).

So there you go folks, there is a run-down of a couple of very interesting places to visit and grab some grub and maybe a brew or two if that's what you love to do... Check it out next time you're in the 'hood.

Lastly, I have been thinking about this, and I want to admit something rather embarrassing. I would also like to know if anyone else has ever done anything like this, or maybe get reassurance that I'm not the only weirdo I guess. O.k. Here goes: I'm going to put this out to you in 'scenario' form, OK?

Let's just say, I'm cruising home in drive-time, rush-hour traffic. I come to one of many stop lights, and I have a neighbor (say, fellow-driver next to me), and they seem like they are wanting to race me, or appear to think I want to beat them, or something like this. [It might even be that we are NOT at a stop light at all, but it's someone just racing me down the street, and hovering in the lane next to me, directly side-by-side, making me uncomfortable. Now, for some reason, the next step I am about to take, makes me feel more comfortable, and in my mind I think that if I do this, they will be "taken off guard", and maybe relax a little, assured that I do not want their spot in the road, neigh do I want to "race". What I do at this point is, Fake a Cellphone Call.

That's right. I look down as if my phone is ringing, and I pick it up and act like I am "answering" a phone call. I actually speak it out loud, "Hello?" [Thinking out a conversation in my head so that my mouth moves naturally and believably, giving enough time for the "other person" to speak]. "... Oh, um... yeah I can do that....... No I don't mind......... OK. Well I should be there in about 30 minutes.... " (and so forth) This usually goes on until either the other driver has clearly passed, turned off, or I have passed them and they are safely out of view.

I know, it sounds like I am raving mad. I feel the same way when I think about what I am doing, but I can't stop doing it. I feel more comfortable. Sometimes it isn't about "racing" another driver and cushioning my intent with the phone call, sometimes it is when I see someone who I might think could be a car-jacker, or assailant. At that point, I do it to show them that I have a Cell Phone and can INDEED Dial 9-11 in the event of an emergency.

Please don't think badly of me. I have never made any claims of normalcy, by any means, and you guys know that. But I just hope that at least someone out there can share a story of at least equal strangeness, if not able to say "Hey! I've done that too!" Go easy on me... I full expect to be bashed in some form about this, but I just had to get that out there. I feel much better now, having gotten it off my chest (although slightly embarrassed as I said before).

Hey hang on just a moment, I'm getting an incoming call. OK?? ;)


Jay said...

You could always just rev the engine a bit and yell at the other driver "Bring it on BEEE-OTCH!" ;-)

BBC said...

My day was OK. Not as great as my weekend but it was ok, I mostly just fucked around.

Kenski said...

You're a complete weirdo for the fake cell call thing... HOWEVER, it's perfectly normal to do what I do and occasionally write a fake text message to buy time whilst waiting for someone to turn up at a bar or restaurant. That's completely understandable, right? Riiight? I mean, you wouldn't want people to think you were some johnny-no-mates hanging around by yourself, would you?

The flip side it that everyone knows about the fake text message thing, so they think you're a loser anyway... D'Oh!

I'm putting too much thought into this, right?

Candy Minx said...

You are hilarious with the fake phone call...but what a good idea!

I finally made it here to say hello. I really enjoyed your ok review of a day in Memphis. I hope to be in Memphis in a couple of weeks. We might stay at Heartbreak Hotel.

Meanwhile...I was in Memphis three years ago and had an awesome time. Ate at Harpers. Was in Knoxville...last week. Boiling hot!

Here is my Knoxville post:

Anonymous said...

A.J. better warn your blog friend of Heartbreak Hotel. Not a good part of town to stay in.

Aunt Jackie said...

Jay! Now that's the way to go! :) Yes yes.

BBC! I enjoy times like those the most... :)

Kenski! Ahhh I was afraid of that. Yes, yours is much more normal behavior, I will take some notes for future reference. HEHE.

Candy Minx! Yes, my sis, below, is correct. I know that the memorabilia and history might draw you to the area that Graceland resides, but that is not a good area to stay in. I would probably try to stay around a hotel in the Southaven, MS area (which is just below the state line), and then go travel up to visit Graceland during the day. It's just about 15 minutes drive. Much safer I believe.

Vick! Thanks for that note, it is true. There is plenty to do or see in Memphis, but you just have to be smart and aware... We weren't named one of the top 5 sweatiest city's and #1 in Violent crimes for nothin!