How do you feel when you are by yourself?
This morning found me thinking about the times in my life that I have truly been alone. In retrospect, it has not been all that often.
Siblings notwithstanding however, because as I have stated before, I grew up more like an only child since my sisters all married and moved out by the time I was age 4.
They were adults, I was a baby.
The good point about that was that they had children, and made me an aunt at a very young age, so I still had plenty of company as a child, or "all I wanted" I guess you could say.
I rarely had a multitude of people around, so I got kind of used to being a loner. My husband, on the other hand, grew up with hordes of people around whether he liked it or not, and he is used to that. He's comfortable with people just helping themselves, stopping by unannounced, and crashing all over the place (people he knows, that is, not as much on people he doesn't know very well). I'm not.
Aunt Jackie likes her privacy. When people pop by without being invited, or come knocking on the door when you aren't expecting them I get highly agitated. I find it rude and over-assuming, inconsiderate really. Basically, one might as well be saying 'I know you have nothing going on in your life, and nothing better to do than stare at my lovely face today. You couldn't possibly have any plans that I am stomping all over. Let me make myself at home.' Arrrgh.
Honestly, at some point I would probably invite any said parties to do something, or to come by and visit, but they don't give me that luxury. Then, of course I am labeled 'bitchy' when this behavior overflows my 'fill line'.
In the morning, I leave for work before Mr. J, he has a relaxing day of surfing the web at work, then he gets home before I do (cushy right?). So when I get home from my hectic stress ball of a day, he's already rested up. He doesn't seem to require the same amount of peace of mind I do either... so he doesn't understand my need for "me time" or any amount of R&R upon my return home. He simply calls me "Lazy". Go figure.
Now, thinking back on times when I lived alone, that's a different experience.
When I rented Bo's house, I remember getting extremely sad. I mean, I was officially "Moving Out" of my parents' home, and it was a big move (even though I was paying just $200 /mo. Remind me why I ever gave this up?) I'd moved into this house during the winter season, so it is marked for me by the scent of cinnamon air freshener and incense, and of course youth. I remember the feeling of dread as I imagined myself sitting alone in the living room of my new abode listening teary-eyed to the song, "Dust In The Wind". (Overdramatic much?)
Of course some circumstances eventually led me to move back in with my parents temporarily until I could figure out something else. I was adamant about trying to make it on my own and had the idea that no girl in her mid-to-late twenties should be living at home with Mommy and Daddy. So that led me to the next apartment, which was about 30 minutes away (the furthest I had lived from home).
My income was not much, so I was in a low-income apartment. I had no furniture besides my bed, a small t.v. which was donated by my big sis, and a CD Player / Radio of course. That apartment was so bare bones, it is embarrassing looking back. Eventually I was donated more things like a couch and chair, so it wasn't SO empty... but it really kinda sucked. The funny thing about it was that I didn't care. I was rarely at home, as my friends and I stayed out and about more than at home. I came in to change clothes, sleep and go again...
Ahhhhhhh sweet energy of youth.
My time renting Bo's house was probably lonelier than that of the apartment since I stayed by myself more there. My friends and boyfriends came to visit of course, so I wasn't always alone, but maybe it was just the mood of that house.
It seems like I was able to live alone sometimes, but usually I sought out the company of my friends, boyfriends or family more often than not. Still, I dislike huge crowds and being bombarded. There are worse things than loneliness, that's the bottom line. ;)
On to other interesting factamundos... Today's Google Logo (if anyone noticed) was a bar code. Yes, today is the anniversary of the invention of the bar code. Isn't that fantastic?? Think of what this has done for our society. I know, this is not one of the biggest things you might have thought about today, but still I found it fun and interesting. One, because I enjoy how Google always incorporates special events into its logo, and two, because I found This Fun Barcode Generator with which I created my very own barcode for "Aunt Jackie" (see above). So try it out and make one for yourself too!
Lastly, I have one more fun little activity for you to try today (assuming you have read this far and are still with your boring old Aunt Jackie).
1. Go to www.google.com.
2. Type in "Google Chuck Norris" -do NOT hit enter or send.
3. Select "I'm Feeling Lucky", and see the result.
Make sure to read it all, and of course feel free to pass that little fun tidbit on to friends.
That's about all I have time for today, so have a good one and please come back tomorrow, and the next day, and the next!
Today's Cool Links:
Find Chuck Norris? Not On Google You Won't!
by Barcodes Inc