Well, it's time to prepare as Friday the 13th is closing in on us... hmmm, that's interesting... Hope it goes off without a hitch. Sounds like a good time for good horror movies or stories... Makes me miss Halloween a little.
Still been catching up on deadlines and commitments so that can be stressful. In fact, I finally just finalized my taxes today (How do you like that Dan?? lol). But I guess it's all good. Nobody likes to feel stretched too thin but I was just touching base with my friend Jinks today. She said she'd been wondering about me, why we hadn't been able to really have ourselves a good chat in a while--I explained to her about my pressing matters and all and just kind of told her how I'd been feeling so discouraged and disgusted sometimes, not even wanting to look in the mirror. I mean, we're getting back on track with our fitness and back to healthy eating, but I catch myself comparing the image I see staring back at me more like a Big Loud-colored Blimp (anyone else ever feel this way?) . I wake up in complete dread of what I'm going to wear, being totally out of any decent clothes and nothing looks good on me... I just want to hide in a dark little cave somewhere.
But I always feel better when I write... I enjoy it so much, it provides me with greatly needed therapy. This is something I know I've touched on many times before though. Honestly, I don't believe in squelching feelings, yes things can boil up and fester within our bodies, and minds when we do try to cover it all up. They have to come out sometime... I won't lecture either on taking care of ourselves, we know how to do it, we merely have to get back on the road again.
As Robert frost said (and I quote) "The Best Way Out Is Always Through." I guess that's really true isn't it?? So we have to go through things, and simply fight it out... we'll come out on the other side to a sunny new day soon... with renewed spirit and energy.
Jinks continued telling me how she had felt under the weather this week, a touch of a virus maybe... so of course, we all know how grueling that can be. She said she had thought so much lately about being able to just to stay home and work on things that made her happy, and to just be satisfied living with her husband's salary and being a homemaker, tasting the fruits of her labor and trying to enjoy life... then she turned around and shrugged it off saying "Oh, I've probably still got a fever."
I told her "Well, If you have a fever, we all have a fever because that would be ideal to be able to be satisfied just being at home, trying to take care of the already full-time job of being a woman/wife/mother/sister/daughter/human being and finding ourselves, doing the things that we are really here for besides stressing and worrying over all this nonsense that we end up doing because we put too many irons in the fire (everything from trying to be a success at our chosen jobs, making others happy, and getting to the point that we ourselves consider true "Success") That would take the life out of any of us really... So get the fever--keep the fever, let it burn us out of this reality and make us go for the cool, clear water of our dreams... we deserve it... Why do we wait so long to become what we really want to be??? Why do we always make excuses about what we have to do when all we really need to do is pursue happiness...? I'm 100% with ya sister."
Then I basically knew I felt like sharing those thoughts with all of you today... Hope you didn't mind :)