Deep In The Forrest

Ok, that video for Big Girls Don't Cry was sickening... so I've replaced it with a little Dirk Diggler... yes, that's right it is "You've Got The Touch." Much better placeholder for me until I come back with one of my always-amazing, thought provoking posts... which I will shortly, so COME BACK!!! :0 If you're just DYING to see the "Big Girls Don't Cry" video still, you can click below... ok?? Don't say I didn't warn you though... It's excrutiating. Big Girls Don't Cry (With "Mr. Pregnant") DO come back in just a bit after I post again, and comment back to me--I've been neglected this week and AuntJackie turns rather sinister when neglected. (Kind of like Captain Corky). :)

This morning, there seemed to be a great deal of noise around me. I am not a morning person in the least (let me stress that: AM NOT a morning person at all!). So when I am trying to begin my daily activities, I am at my best when things (near my desk) are pretty dull and quiet. However, there are those occasions when they are not quiet at all. There are "speakerphone calls" going on at 2 or 3 different locations at the same time, or there are 'mini-meetings' going on directly behind me (even while the speakerphone-fests are still happening). Just general traffic flow to and from the printer that I sit right near can be noisy enough. It can drive you to inhale white-out some days (and maybe even those niftyl 'Dry Erase' markers... I'm just sayin!). As the day goes along, of course, I get better, and better... Best to catch me sometime after lunch. Not RIGHT after lunch, you understand, as most of the time there is a 'buffer' period needed after lun...

This just crossed my mind, and I thought I would share a new poem. I can't speak the dedication. It is more important to protect an innocent season that still has a chance to blossom from spring to summer. "Stolen" (new, written by me) © 2007 Jacqueline Wood I am that same girl just hidden under skin scratch the wound open see just where I've been Once like you with hopes and dreams and thoughts of knowing all Who'd have thought when you were small you had such power to take it all take it all away? What if you knew what your existence brought? What if you knew how hard I fought, to forget it all and start so new and push away the memory that there ever was a time it was any different than the now? What would you do if someone like you changed your life forever for good or for the better? How would you feel, if he traded in your sunrise for million a rainy day? What if he too went away? Took your innocence along, could you be so strong? How about forgiveness... i...

I found the following little quiz while over at ZigZagMan's place . It was a quiz about what 'rating' your blog would get. His rated an NC-17. Mine is totally just embarrassing. So I moved on to another little quiz... I decided I wanted to see what chance I had of surviving a Zombie Apocolypse. 36% This is not good news. Looks like I am going to have to step up my game and start a little Zombie preparedness. I need to increase my collection of weapons, maybe do a little target practice (I am really good with guns, but hey I am a little out of practice). I also need to stock up on more 'Apocolypse Food' it would seem. Also, I need to get my fitness level back in good range for running from the zombies... I would be good for MAYBE a mile, then it would be all she wrote. I don't have much of a problem when it comes to caring what happens to the strangers, or opening doors when I hear a noise, but I would be lagging behind when it came to trying to save a loved one...

This is the Monday "Don't Try This At Home" segment. This guy clearly had already drank enough to rid him of his logic... You should blow the flame out on the shot BEFORE you drink it. Let that be a lesson to you all!! :)

I had recently been reminded of my strong distaste for Clowns over at Barnze's blog . He's had a couple of posts about them, although he and I have always agreed that clowns are 'evil f#&ckers' LOL! So in honor of Barnze, and and any of the rest of us that can't stand these completely 'UN-Funny' freaks, I thought, how better to start our Monday, than do a little Clowning Around! :O) First off, when searching for something particularly freakish about clowns I was very disturbed to find THIS LINK (go ahead click it, if you dare) . (Not for the faint of heart, where clowns are concerned). Then if that's not enough, I found even more evidence that Clowns are unfit for society and dangerous creeps! Read: 'Kasper the Clown' faces prison for punching schoolboy. I know some people like them, but I know a ton of people who share my views on them. They're heinous, creepy and usually have something to hide in their dark clown-closet with their big ...

All is well on the home front after my extended ancient aging rituals (a.k.a. Birthday celebrations). Our Gig went really well! We got a pretty good response from everyone. As I sang, I scanned the audience, and saw lots of people rocking out. There was quite an interesting mix of people there too. Even though we had already gone over our time, the club owner asked us to do one more song! She said "Rock Me!" So we did. The sound was mixed very well, and my vocals rocked... We got much positive feedback, one of the waitresses even told me she thought I sounded amazing & wished I could come and sing her to sleep (was that a pass or just a compliment? Rockdog and Zig be quiet! LOL!). Of course, we stayed afterwards for the next act so it was late when we left... Then Mr. J was supposed to be following me so I could show him the way out. I had my co-worker, Vikram in the car and Richie had his friend Kenny in the truck. I was watching carefully, when I got on the interstate r...

Approximately 9:01 a.m. on a beautiful Monday morning (not all THAT long ago), the world became blessed with the light of one very special child. The Mother was ecstatic as this was the baby she had been praying for! She named her Jacqueline Dawn (although she nearly named her something else entirely, but wished to name her after her Dad). So it was on this day that she was born... The world did not know what a serious "Butt Whooping" it was about to get, and as well, the Guardian Angels did not know how hard their job was about to be! They have all done very well, however as she is still alive and kicking... Her Mom called this morning (very early) to tell her "Happy Birthday Dawn of the Morning!" Happy Birthday to Me! Let's have a look back in history for the ever-changing, all-powerful Aunt Jackie: Here I am crushing my inchworm, circa (approx) 2.5 years old. 12th Birthday at McDonald's (I'm the one on the right of course, with the orange balloon) ...

You guys really think you're something don't you? I mean you really have an ego, and it shows. Men have it made! You seem to handle aging much better than us... you know, 'the girls' . We don't really get this. Just about the only reason I can think of is that nobody makes you feel worthless if you aren't still '20something' anymore, or if you get gray hair (you get called suave and "distinguished"). Depending on your circumstances, people even look over your ample beer gut or your worst habits. Then there is the sexuality and fertility issue, you guys are made to feel like aging gives you more charming or virile qualities. You can also continue to father children as long as you're reasonably functional. We have an 'expiration date'. Although it is completely unfair, it's not an argument that's really worth tackling because I'm sure most of you would say... "Hey, it's just the way it is." Right? So be it. ...

( Meanwhile, at the Forrest , while the rest of the world sleeps peacefully...) 2:00 a.m. I wake up, freaking out thinking that I am running late. Oddly, I feel perfectly refreshed (wide-awake in fact) and ready to start the day. However, looking at the clock when I realize it is only 2 a.m., I force myself to go back to sleep and catch 'a few more winks'. 5:40 a.m. the alarm begins its daily act of terrorism, but I don't hear it until closer to 6:00. 5:55 a.m. I roll over slightly and nudge Richie, telling him it is '6 and ask him (rather inaudibly) if we're going to the gym'? To be a good sport, I nudge him a couple more times, he seems unresponsive so I hit the snooze button and settle back into my feather pillow. 6:20something, I hit the snooze again and then again a few more times... by now, feeling sleepy enough to probably sleep until noon. 7:14 a.m. I jump up, and begin the arduous task of opening my now sleep-welded eyes. 7:25 a.m. I enter the shower, w...

I got a motorcycle for Christmas when I was about 12. It was a "Honda MB5" built for only one person and could be driven on the road, but still I drove my nieces and my sister around whenever nobody was looking. It was a great two-wheel vehicle, and I got a ton of enjoyment out of the thing. Looking back now, I cannot imagine what possessed my Mother to agree to me owning a motorcycle because she was so overprotective. Now, even my husband won't agree to let me have one... maybe I'll eventually wear him down. What is it we chicks dig about motorcycles? I've been a fan ever since fifth grade when I pledged my eternal love to "The Fonz" during Happy Days re-runs. From then on, I was hooked. Whenever I would see one on the road, my heart would leap and my imagination would run wild with fantasies of riding off on the long highways with a handsome, roughneck on a "Hog". Fonz was the least of Mama's worries, however as this obsession would lat...

Hope your weekend was great! I just thought I would start off Monday by sharing with you 3 candid shots of Mr. J enjoying a nice brew (they're just cam phone shots, so they're not the best quality). Does this make you beer-fanatics thirsty on a Monday?? :) **Coming tomorrow, Aunt Jackie's mischievous adventures with motorcycle men send her screeching down the highway...

Happy Father's Day to everyone who's a "Dad". Remember, any man can be a Father, but it takes a very special man to be a "Daddy". :) Mine is top-notch, and I'm going to see him this weekend, so you guys have a safe and happy one--I'm going to sing him a song and give him a big Father's day hug... Everyone at least do something nice for your parents this weekend, if they are still with us--For those of you who's parents have moved on to the next level, don't feel bad... they're watching over you, and haven't gone far. They're in the breeze that's flowing through your hair, they're the butterflies that may light on you strangely. They're everywhere. :) Talk to you when I return.

Thought I would start off the day with a little poetry, something I wrote recently. Don't let it alarm you (that is for family). Just something I had to get off my chest. Have a great Friday. "Awakening" ©2007 Jacqueline Wood Hole in my head nothing worth fighting for can't make things right my soul, now a festering sore my mind is scrambled like filthy embryo on the floor cobwebs in my jumbled black closet trying to forget but I can't chase away the prophetic past stuck on perpetual play I'm fucking you but not like you think pain just pushing me to the brink The monster that I've become is the same one I saved the others from Bullets like skulls in my eyes one plus one = none surprise, surprise

Now I'm a firm believer in try, try again. And we're humans so we live to make mistakes and learn from them. Hence my work e-mail signature-> "Only those who do nothing at all make no mistakes." There comes a time however, when you need to change courses, or get the hint that you're on the wrong path. This brings me to the new feature I am bringing to my blog called the "Aunt Jackie Give-It-Up" Award. Therefore, the first ever "Give It Up" award goes to this guy. Read: Man fails school exams on 38th try

First of all, here's my "Quote du Jour": Charles M. Schulz - "I have a new philosophy. I'm only going to dread one day at a time." Just because it's been a long week... now, that being said: ZigZagMan Zure Zapped Me Zagain with his "8 things"....tag. Let's see what I can do. First things first, here are the rules as they were posted to me.....so if you should be tagged as well, here are the guidlines...:) I have to post these rules before I give you the facts. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog. Zere Zew Zgo Zig!!! 1) Going to Karaoke is something I love, but nobody ever wants to do with me. 2) I get pretty ugly cases of Road Rage. ...

When you see the ripe red watermelons, you truly know that summer has arrived. We should remember to immerse ourselves in joy and the sweetness of life like kids do. As you can see in this photo of my niece Reanna and nephew, Jackson-they have no problem diving in Face First. Never grow up guys, EVER! Hold on to that magic... Here's to Summer.

Best Wishes to friends of Jackie who are having a Birthday Friday, June 15, and you know who you are... I hope for you everything you deserve in life. This is a song I like by the "Dixie Chicks" called "Voice Inside My Head"... I don't normally listen to very much country music but the lyrics of this song tell a neat story... They touched my heart. I hope you enjoy. My band's gig went well last night, still mostly people that I know came to see us, but a few stragglers came in. Our friend at the bar said he kept hearing really good comments about us, then he wished us luck at our June 22nd show at The Stage Stop. Kudzus is just a great down-home little place. I love it there... Thanks again Martin and Kudzu's! We'll see you again soon! I'm quite zapped today, I feel like I stepped out in front of a trolley on Main Street and got smacked... but I'm sure it will pass... just those weeknight gigs can get ya. I'll be trying to play catch up, ...

Today's Tip of the Day!! Do not wear to work the conspicuously-tight pants, no matter how excited you are that they actually fit, as well as buttoned, even if they seem to be comfortable enough at the time, and yes even if they are not threatening to rip upon entry to your vehicle. Believe me, later in the day through the mid-day heat, and swealter... and with your after-lunch bloat you will be wishing you had instead worn a " moo-moo " dress (with comfortable shoes). Seriously ... just don't. That is all.

Rant #1 for Monday: Monday morning Rush hour is no place for you "Sunday Drivers" . Don't get me wrong... I don't have a problem whatsoever with you driving like a snail, and i'm all for safety on the road. What you happen to be doing, however, is not safe. Not that any of you rotten apples of the road are going to listen to what I have to say, but just in case these words don't totally fall on blind eyes, or the proverbial 'deaf ear', here are a few tips for you aliens to the busy rush hour interstates and freeways. If you're going to drive slow, do it in the appropriate lane and kindly get out of the "Acceleration Lane". Do not drive slowly in the "Acceleration Lane" and expect people to stay off your ass. If you were going at least the speed limit, or driving in the proper lane for slower traffic, you wouldn't be having the problem. Furthermore, if you do (oddly enough) have a line of cars riding said bumper, maybe you s...

Waking up on Saturday is always the climax of the week, no matter what you've had going on it feels great when you sleep late, and then know you don't have to go anywhere or do anything if you don't want to... That's exactly what I did yesterday. Once I woke up, I did a few things, watched a little T.V., and fell back asleep for about a 2 hour afternoon doze-fest! When I woke up, it was time to get ready for band practice... We hadn't practiced Thursday night, which is our normal night, but we wanted to work on a few specific songs for our set, so as a band we went out to eat at The Bar-B-Q Shop in Midtown, Memphis. It's top-notch if you're going to be in Memphis and want to try our fine BBQ (and yes, they have beer)! Don't be fooled by the more commercialized "popular" ones... take it from me. So we ate a nice dinner, then we practiced. Mr. J and I then went home and had a nice quiet late evening. I arrived home too late to listen to Rockdo...

It's not quite over just yet... the week that is. I'm thankful that it is Friday though, that's for certain. Lately I've just been listening to tunes, watching a little t.v. here and there and catching up on some housework when I can. Last weekend, I happened to see "The Shining" and I sat back and watched it (almost) in its entirety. That brought back some memories... Classic. Let's see, other than that I noticed that "Sometimes They Come Back Again" came on, but I really prefer "Sometimes They Come Back". "The Stand" also aired... all of the parts, like a marathon. I can't abide "The Stand". Maybe I should read the book sometimes if I have time, as I am told that the book really shames the movie anyway... don't they usually? Other than that, I don't have much to report. Still feeling the need for a nice escape soon... I would love to take a week's vacation and go somwhere really neato, but I doubt I...

We had a blast last night, and would like to truly thank Kudzu's Bar and Deli, Memphis, TN , for being such a gracious establishment and making us feel like part of the family. For other bands out there, just as everyone else has told us--When you play at Kudzu's, it's a comfortable, friendly environment and it's like playing in your living room. Everyone there is super-nice, and as the review states in the link above, the food is always fantastic and they have a great selection of beers too. Whether you're popping in for an after-work beer, relaxing on the weekend, or coming out to see my band, "SAP" play, you can't lose with Kudzu's... it just grows on you! :) [read the Amazing Story of Kudzu (the vine) and learn how it got so widespread.] Anyway, thanks again Kudzu's! You guys are top-notch, and we really love coming there and playing as well as just hanging out. I love those guys from the "Thursday Night Pickin Party" too, w...

Interesting quote for the day: "We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful what we pretend to be." - Kurt Vonnegut I got my drivers license at 15. That's not totally unheard of, I know but it is still rare. Plus, I've been driving something or another since I could walk so I've been driving for... a long time. Around here, drivers licenses or State IDs (for those of you who can't drive but still must prove who you are), are used for multiple purposes. You must present these to the law upon being pulled over, or going through the ever-popular 'Road Block'. Or simply 'getting carded'. The first time I used mine was when we caught sneaking into the boy's dorm at the local community college. My friend, Kathy was dead set on going over to see some guy she claimed to be friends with. As usual, I was dragged along as an accomplice. So we drive over to 'Quitman Dormitory' I think it was, parked and proceeded straight through the fr...

I'm back, sort of... I guess. I took a little weekend break from the blog. In fact, I was practically worthless over the weekend, almost like I was in hibernation. I don't know why. Friday night went very nice, we went out to "Kudzu's", which is a little bar in downtown Memphis where we will be playing tomorrow night, our first little gig and all. We went to Kudzu's to hang out and celebrate Richie's birthday, as well as just make an appearance and check out the scene and all. There were some musicians playing there Friday night who are part of a Thursday night event called "Pickin Party". These guys are not exactly a group, but they just hang out and jam together. Their instruments range from their guitars to their ukulele and Dobro. They played many different songs ranging from folk, and old outlaw country stuff to some acoustic versions of pretty known rock songs... They were great. It was a small group of us just celebrating. Richie's fri...

Wow, it is June 1st! This year is passing off so fast! Today is all about one special man... Sincere special birthday wishes going out to the most wonderful guy ever, my very own guitar god, a best friend, and someone who can make me laugh somehow even when I'm sad or mad as hell. He just so happens to be my husband too... Happy Birthday Richie!!! I hope you enjoy your new PRS and hope that there are so many more birthdays that we get to celebrate together... I love you more than you know. :) Have a perfect, rockin day! You deserve it. (Don't worry folks, I'll make sure he gets to have plenty of his favorite brew tonight! I will look out for him! ) :)