Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Bad Things

**This post (or note) has sexual talk and adult situations so if you are around your children go ahead and mark it for a 'read later' type of thing. I don't want anyone mad at me for any adult material... since everyone's so darn sensitive... hey, you guys were all rad once... right? ha!**

I digress... let's begin the post.

For some reason, I am always wayyy behind on the news. For instance, A "Gene Simmons Sex Tape Scandal" leaked out in like February 2008 and I just now ran across this. Now, you might wonder why I would even be curious about the sexual exploits of some old-n-moldy, formerly cool Rocker dude like Gene... well, I wouldn't really, but he is a Rock Icon, and of course he has that gargantuan tongue and lots of money. That's the only "pro" that would get me with gene... well, pros.

From the time when I even remotely could think of a fling with a KISS member, it was Paul (and I know everyone is really waiting for his Tranny video to emerge anyway right? So don't even say it).

So in this sex video, which I could not find the whole full-length video any longer (thanks to my being the UN-earlybird), I managed to find a page with a couple of clips of said video. Believe me that was enough. First off, the setting was some frilly underaged girl room with cat pillows. I guess the girl was of age, she was rumored to be a model for his "Frank's Energy Drink" campaign. Secondly the music made me LMAO. It was Foreigner's "I Want To Know What Love Is." This was the soundtrack of their "love". Lastly, Gene did the deed like a turtle on heroin, and when he tried to kiss the girl she refused repeatedly. It was a pretty sad scene.

Got me thinking even more about the perils of aging and being all washed up... also made me realize that if I ever did even consider Gene it would HAVE to be with the Demon make-up on (which would've been my request even when he was young prolly)... LOL! Ok, sorry for that visual everyone, and I'm sure my family is puking their guts up right now. Well, I warned ya.

Since I am in the mood for sharing a few bad things, I thought that I would mention some of the little bad things that I have gotten myself into growing up and throughout my life... I'm not sure what detail I want to go into or how deep I want to get into the bad deeds. Let me think on this for a moment.

Back in th' day, believe it or not, I was the "good" one... I was painfully shy, barely cussed, couldn't talk to men, and tried to live by the Girl Scout code ;)

However, my closest friends were always getting me into kinks. As adults, the tables kind of turned... I became the wicked little bad one and they all turned into June Cleaver.

Bad Thing #1 - Breaking and Entering

Once upon a time, long long ago, one of my good friends and I were chasing after these two dudes, L. and R. For anonymity sake, let's call this friend Wilma... lol!

Ok, so Wilma and I were hanging out one weekend and decided we needed to pay a visit to L. and R. She thought R. was cute and I was highly in love with L. at the time. So we went over there and they were not at home.

"Ok, I said well maybe we can check back later or next weekend. Guess they're out partying."

Wilma said, "Well, wait... while we're here we might as well have a look around."

"What?!?" I exclaimed innocently.

So Wilma gets out of the car and goes up and just checks to see if the door might be unlocked which was pretty unlikely I thought. She's messing around with the knob and lo and behold the door of course is locked, but it comes straight off the hinges!!! (This was an old home btw. Or we might be able to contribute some of it to her spinach-addiction)

At this point, I freak out and am like, "Oh my god! We're going to get into such trouble! What if they come home??"

Wilma's grinning evilly and says, "Well let's just go in and have a look around.

"Damn! We're In A Tight Spot!!!" I say... oh wait, that was George Clooney from "O' Brother Where Art Thou?" Sorry... I basically continued freaking out and worrying that they were going to drive up any second and we would be lynched!!

So we go in, yes of course I followed right behind her, and she starts digging through all their stuff, messing with things on the mantle and seeing what she could find of R's for keepsakes and what-not. I could not relax long enough to even think of going through L's stuff... I was too in fear that he was gonna kill us. I would NEVER have a chance with him now if he knew we were this brazen, which is pretty decent-level stalking I might add... not to mention a crime basically.

Yes they could've pressed charges if they'd found out... but amazingly they did not. We left without being seen. Next time we saw them no questions were asked as I recall, and we continued our stalkerific crusade to annoy the total hell out of these boys.

I never "got the guy", so-to-speak... L. and I never dated, but we did hook up and have a heck of a make-out session (n'stuff), and he was my first real kiss ever... so I guess that was a big deal.

Maybe I will save my other dirty deeds for another post about "Bad Things", pending how these were received... Anyone?? Anyone?? ;-)

**Also, I will have my Weekly Words Challenge Photos up tomorrow as early as possible, so check back. Sorry I'm such a dunce lately!


Jay said...

I've never broken into anyone's house and gone through their shit. I've done a few other things that were technically illegal though. LOL ;-)

Nothingman said...

oh he he he should have gotten some souvenirs :)


g-man said...

You know I am always up for sex talk.

I have done the B&E a couple times. Never some girl's house though. Stalkerella :)