Well, I'm playing a bit of Ketchup today in my work, since I was in training class yesterday-which went fine, I rather enjoyed it. Got my web skills fresh on the brain and all. Guess I'll just post another semi-short one today, as I haven't really had time to write up anything new. I do plan on continuing to bring you the rest of my Butterflies, Zebras and Moonbeams saga, so if you're enjoying that then look for more of it soon. If you haven't read it, you can click This Link Or The Link Above and you can go through parts I - III and 'Ketchup'. :)
Before Mother's Day, I had spoken about the family and there seems to be an ever-increasing gap growing between us all. Each of my family members has been through way more than they deserve, I don't deny that. My sisters each have their crosses to bear, with pains that they have experienced; so does my Mother by a long shot. I have been through a good bit but nothing compared to them yet, but I'm sure that I will... that's life. We know that Life is a mixture of pain and ecstasy, that's a given. But it's how we handle it that counts.
Therefore, Mother's Day was almost as much of a downer as I had expected--Everyone left their husbands at home, which I guess was fine-I didn't mind spending the girl time with my sisters and mom. My Mom, in addition to the things that already have her down in life tends to take on the pains of the rest of the family whether you want her to or not. You can keep things from her, tell her not to worry, but she still does. You can try to hide the truth from her, try to make her think that things are fine when they're not. Even if you think you're doing it to 'spare her' of the worry, it doesn't. She is going to worry anyway.
As I said, everyone in my family has their own pains going on right now but Mother's day tended to highlight my sister, Jeanne's. She was in a raunchy mood I could tell just when she arrived. I tried to speak to her by saying, "Jean, I'm so glad to see you." to which she shot me a cold, dagger-like stare and then just looked away as she walked into the house never even acknowledging my affection. I can excuse that I guess given all that I feel she had on her heart, although she's never given me much sisterly love. I sometimes wonder if it's a resentment of me being the baby of the family... who knows... I only know that the whole mood of Mother's Day was rather tough to take.
Spent some quality time with my great-niece Reanna and great-nephew Jackson on the floor of the screened in porch drawing and coloring. Kids can renew the spirit and help you forget the adult-hells that we bring upon ourselves...
All in all, I see the aging and decline of my family, and now more than ever I want to scramble to hold onto my childlike heart and mind. When we're fortunate enough to have family and friends that love us, we should cherish them and recognize the value of that. Not everyone gets to be that lucky... even though things are hard sometimes, it could always be worse... just take a look around.
Having a youthful outlook and soul is not a crime. In my opinion, it is mandatory for making it through this world alive. I'm going to stop feeling guilty that I refuse to "grow up"... It's an advantage if you ask me.
None of us make it out of here alive, so while we're here we should squeeze every drop of joy we can out of it... even when it hurts. Honestly, just as the saying states "You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing."
So go out there and be childish, find humor wherever you can and laugh... big stomach cramping belly laughs. Don't care who's watching, don't care if someone's whispering about it. Just do it. And if that doesn't help, add Ketchup.