Deep In The Forrest

Ahhh yes, those elusive "Better Days". I have seen them, but they are still hiding, shyly like an only child on the first day of school. No, I'm not saying that I'm going through the worst time of my life right now at all, and I'm not a 'Whiner' by trade. However, I am just ready for things to take a definite turn in my desired direction. The problem is most likely with me, I will admit that. It's true, I haven't exactly embraced change lovingly. Rather, the changes in my life have taken me hostage under protest, although I have tried hard to accept them. These changes have not been a batch I would have chosen, if I had been given some opportunity to put in a personal request. Honestly? I have learned the hard way, that if we don't take a proactive approach in creating the life that we deserve, and want to live, we get "bulldozed" forward, uprooted and put back on the open road faced with so many directions that it can be blinding. Wh...

So I fell off again completely. I know. Well the time is coming for me to blog again, and I have been wanting to start. At first I thought about doing a completely new blog, but I have an attachment to this one with all of its ups and downs, and I just don't really wanna let go of it. That's the way I am with a lot of things.  Call it a fault, or maybe a gift, but sentimentality is a big part of me.  Gearing up for a big comeback, Aunt Jackie ** Not that I like this song really, but I thought it was fitting.  

Yes, I'm trying to make regular posts, but with my computer still on the outs at home, and my phone not being quite as sweet as a Blackberry should be, I am still waxing and waning like my ruling planet. ((Insert favorite 'taking Jackie overly-serious, trying to call her ignorant comment here so she can blatantly disregard it and think you're a moron)). I've had several topics go in and out of my head that I thought about writing about, and then I get distracted, busy or both and don't get a chance to capture a few lines to hold my place. One that has kind of held on is something that I keep wondering about myself, as well as others who might share this idiosyncrasy. Pass The Popcorn!!!  The question plaguing my mind is, "Why do I relentlessly watch certain movies over and over gazillions of times?" Seriously, some movies I can barely make it through once, some are movies that I say, "Ah that one was pretty good, but I wouldn't really watc...

I don't have much time to throw down a post, but I thought I would pop in for a quick post-New Year's update. The holidays being over, my smile is slowly growing. Yes I am so glad the holidays came, went and are long over. Anyroad, I haven't really been able to get to blogger much, I attempted a post from my cellphone via text last night but it wasn't set-up or didn't work, so here I am. My home PC has been down for repair, and I am waiting for parts to come in, so I haven't really had convenient time or place to blog. Not much yet to report for the brand new year we're in, except just acclimating to new systems at work due to the new company that recently came in, so it's been a little hectic there. Don't worry, I'm not stopping and my frequency will continue, I just hit a little snag in time. Check you later... AJ

Oh goody! It's nearly 2012 so you know what that means, we get to look forward to another year with people obsessed about doomsday prophecies and all that cool jazz. I'm interested to see how much crazier people can get about these things. In the meantime, however we have to keep working on our own destinies... one moment at a time, right? If we get a new moment, then we make the best of it and keep climbing and trying, not driving and crying... lol. Anyway, Christmas? I survived... I'm just very glad it is over. Now I just hope I can finally see some progress and work on more good things about myself this year. It's time for change, and I mean more than just that stupid crap that refuses to come out of the vending machine. In honor of the new year that we are looking towards, I will interject a word about Resolutions... I don't do them. That's my resolution... I resolve not to make resolutions... so instead, I offer some alternative "affirmations...

Speaks for itself, so I don't really need to type out some overly-wordy blog post today... Holidays suck way more when you're alone.

We're really staring straight down the barrel of Christmas now, it's a four-day week and then we are off Friday and Monday for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I have no pepped up feelings about the holidays at all. Mostly, I just feel dread, as I have to go home to Mom's house and as much as it pains me to say that I can't really enjoy visiting Moms because it's so depressing, but I HAVE to go because if I didn't she would fall apart with sadness, and nobody else will go see her at all, except on holidays, so I'm really the only person she sees except her Wednesday appointments with her sister to get her hair done, Ms. Billingsley down the road and the church folks. I have to admit that it hurts me to think about it, makes me pretty glad I don't have children in a way. Because you love and devote your life to your family, then you get 70something or whatever and they all go off and have their own lives and don't come check on you or just come in f...