Deep In The Forrest

Crap I Did It Again

2012-01-19T10:12:00.000-04:00

Yes, I'm trying to make regular posts, but with my computer still on the outs at home, and my phone not being quite as sweet as a Blackberry should be, I am still waxing and waning like my ruling planet. ((Insert favorite 'taking Jackie overly-serious, trying to call her ignorant comment here so she can blatantly disregard it and think you're a moron)).

I've had several topics go in and out of my head that I thought about writing about, and then I get distracted, busy or both and don't get a chance to capture a few lines to hold my place. One that has kind of held on is something that I keep wondering about myself, as well as others who might share this idiosyncrasy.

Pass The Popcorn!!!

The question plaguing my mind is, "Why do I relentlessly watch certain movies over and over gazillions of times?" Seriously, some movies I can barely make it through once, some are movies that I say, "Ah that one was pretty good, but I wouldn't really watch it again." Then there are those that I find I either drag out of my collection and toss in the DVD player even though I've seen them so many times I have memorized every line, or I will see that they are on TV and get caught up and mesmerized and have to watch 'since it just happens to be on'.

A few of these for me, are "Back To The Future" (all of them), "Breakfast Club", "Ferris Bueller's Day Off", "Sixteen Candles" (you can see that these are just favorite 80s movies that must conjure up something for me. More modern ones are "Just Friends" (starring Ryan Reynolds and Amy Smart--HILARIOUS to me), "White Chicks", "The Best Man", "Mona Lisa Smile", "Runaway Bride", "The Brothers", "Soul Food", "Grumpy Old Men / Grumpier Old Men", and then of course some of my Christmas faves I get stuck on in the season, "Bad Santa", "A Christmas Story"... Well you get the picture, and I promise there are many more in my collection.

Many people that know this about me don't understand, and then you have others who are down with the same affliction. So I just don't know... what actually causes those of us who do, to be compelled to sit through these cinematic adventures with limitless fervor? Feel free to repeat the same ol' tired observations about watching movies and t.v. being a waste of valuable time, because hey I already know that, but I'm grown and I waste my time as I wish.

Anyway, it's just something that I was thinking about.

Day Late and a Dollar Short

2012-01-06T18:08:00.002-04:00

I don't have much time to throw down a post, but I thought I would pop in for a quick post-New Year's update. The holidays being over, my smile is slowly growing. Yes I am so glad the holidays came, went and are long over.

Anyroad, I haven't really been able to get to blogger much, I attempted a post from my cellphone via text last night but it wasn't set-up or didn't work, so here I am. My home PC has been down for repair, and I am waiting for parts to come in, so I haven't really had convenient time or place to blog. Not much yet to report for the brand new year we're in, except just acclimating to new systems at work due to the new company that recently came in, so it's been a little hectic there.

Don't worry, I'm not stopping and my frequency will continue, I just hit a little snag in time.

Check you later... AJ

The End Is Near

2011-12-27T17:59:00.000-04:00

Oh goody! It's nearly 2012 so you know what that means, we get to look forward to another year with people obsessed about doomsday prophecies and all that cool jazz. I'm interested to see how much crazier people can get about these things.

In the meantime, however we have to keep working on our own destinies... one moment at a time, right? If we get a new moment, then we make the best of it and keep climbing and trying, not driving and crying... lol.

Anyway, Christmas? I survived... I'm just very glad it is over. Now I just hope I can finally see some progress and work on more good things about myself this year. It's time for change, and I mean more than just that stupid crap that refuses to come out of the vending machine.

In honor of the new year that we are looking towards, I will interject a word about Resolutions... I don't do them. That's my resolution... I resolve not to make resolutions... so instead, I offer some alternative "affirmations" if anyone is feeling inspirational (and/or sarcastic)... if not, shut the fuck up I'm rich enough without your 2 cents... you do you, I'll do me. (yeah yeah, insert juvenile, tasteless sexual innuendo here that I will just ignore).

So... here you go, like it or not... here's to the new year, the beginning of "The End" and all...

In 2012,

As I release feelings of guilt, I get more in touch with my inner sociopath.

I have the power to channel my imagination into ever-soaring levels of suspicion and paranoia.

I assume full responsibility for my actions, except the ones that are someone else's fault.

In some cultures what I do would be considered normal.

My intuition nearly makes up for my lack of wisdom and judgment.

I need not suffer in silence while I can still moan, whimper, and complain.

When someone hurts me, I know that forgiveness is cheaper than a lawsuit, but not nearly as rewarding.

I am at one with my duality.

Blessed are the flexible, for they can tie themselves in knots.

I will strive to live each day as if it were my 50th birthday.

I honor & express all facets of my being, regardless of state/local laws.

Today I will gladly share my experience and advice, for there are no sweeter words than "I told you so!"

A scapegoat is almost as good as a solution.

Just for today, I will not sit in my living room all day in my underwear. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.

I will no longer waste my time reliving the past; I will spend it worrying about the future.

The complete lack of evidence is surest proof the conspiracy is working.

Before I criticize a man, I walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.

Please Come Home

2011-12-20T16:12:00.000-04:00

Speaks for itself, so I don't really need to type out some overly-wordy blog post today...

Holidays suck way more when you're alone.

The Nightmare Before Christmas

2011-12-19T17:35:00.003-04:00

We're really staring straight down the barrel of Christmas now, it's a four-day week and then we are off Friday and Monday for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I have no pepped up feelings about the holidays at all. Mostly, I just feel dread, as I have to go home to Mom's house and as much as it pains me to say that I can't really enjoy visiting Moms because it's so depressing, but I HAVE to go because if I didn't she would fall apart with sadness, and nobody else will go see her at all, except on holidays, so I'm really the only person she sees except her Wednesday appointments with her sister to get her hair done, Ms. Billingsley down the road and the church folks.

I have to admit that it hurts me to think about it, makes me pretty glad I don't have children in a way. Because you love and devote your life to your family, then you get 70something or whatever and they all go off and have their own lives and don't come check on you or just come in for a cup of coffee just to visit and break up the long, monotonous dreary day. She feels sad a lot because nobody ever comes by. Then I just feel worse. So even if I had children, more than likely I would still be gearing up just to die alone.

It's life I guess.

Then the shopping for Christmas, I like to do much of my stuff online... because I simply despise crowds and stores and just the whole experience. So I try to get away with as little trouble as possible. Besides, people are so hard to buy for anyway, and unless I have someone to get gifts for that have a specific need or I know they appreciate, then giving gift cards or money are easiest, even though that's not very personal.

Like Mom again for instance. She has too many "knick-knacks" so she doesn't want anything else that she has to 'set' anywhere in the house. She is hard to buy clothes for because she refuses to wear anything that fits, and she's so small, it's hard to find things that fit anyway. Plus she's picky, so it's really better off to take her shopping for clothes.

Musically, I have avoided Christmas songs like the plague, and instead opted to continue my normal listening to my own music collection, CD's, playlists. There's not much Christmas music that I feel is very uplifting anyway, it gets more sickly annoying than peppy. Except during the month of July, when I might have a couple of days of strange Christmas yearning... of course out-of-place and odd. Me Me Me!

Movies, that's really where it's at... The most enjoyment I get out of the Christmas season is watching my favorite holiday movies. I guess I live vicariously through their perfect families, humor and holiday spirit. They are usually comedies, but some drama. My favorites are "A Christmas Story", "Bad Santa", "Just Friends" (not really considered a Christmas movie but set around the holiday so it is in essence for me, the Charlie Brown cartoons and some other cartoons that I remember enjoying from childhood... there are a few. "Christmas with the Kranks" wasn't bad, and then of course the "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia Christmas Special" was good, because that's just incredibly funny, raucous humor.

It will be over before I know it though, and on to a brand new year that will zip by ultra-fast, once again, so I guess it'll be o.k. Yeah, I know I write a lot of posts about staying positive and motivated and looking at the bright side, trying to progress and ascend and bring joy... Just doesn't apply to holidays for me. I gotta have at least holidays off from being awesome. Ho, ho ho!! Give me a break. =)

For the video treat to this post, I couldn't embed, so Click Here to see South Park's episode "A Very Crappy Christmas".

Laughin to keep from cryin... AJ

Over The Gump

2011-12-15T12:58:00.001-04:00

You know, the more I live and learn about people, the more I confidently say that Stupidity is a sexually transmitted disease. Many people who have no business having children just keep spreading it like crazy... I know that sounds a little cynical and inhumane, but hey the truth when told really "smarts" sometimes.

One thing that I can't help but wonder is why the biggest idiots are always the ones opening their mouths and trying to show off, acting like they have all the answers.

Sometimes you really do want to smack them in the mouth and scream, "Hey Stupid!! Shut the Hell up, and save some oxygen for the people with half a brain!"

They make themselves look so much more asinine when they insist on basting us in their verbal vomit than if they could just sit back in silence, giving everyone's ears a break from their incessant aural assault. Then regarding their brainlessness?

None would be the wiser!

Lately, I suppose I have just had my fill of the dazed and confused, the dopey, doltish, thick-headed, moronic, half-baked, out-to-lunch, several-bricks-shy-of-a-load LOSERS! It's just such a drain on my energy. After all, you can't get through to someone with no capability for "reason". It's a losing game. As Albert Einstein once said, "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

However mind-boggling, it is still hilarious as hell when you run across those that think they are so very clever, and think they are fooling anyone with their games. That's when it's fun just to sit back and watch them hang themselves with their own 'Stupid Rope'. Though this will probably get me cussed out, I have to say in certain cases Sterilization is a damn good idea.

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt."
-Bertrand Russell

In Love With Friday

2011-12-09T17:40:00.001-04:00

It's been a tiring week, and I'm so glad to see Friday. I've been thinking hard on all the ways I need to work on myself and improve for this coming year. It's time for positive changes and I have got to get myself moving in more productive directions all the way around. I want to focus on my art work, maybe begin writing a book, and get my personal life out of the running for 'The Jerry Springer Show". I just want to feel relaxed and peaceful again. I'm ready!

Now, nobody bitch me out, I am not blaming anyone but myself. This is a personal vendetta with ME, BY Me just stating my own lament and taking responsibility for said circumstance. This is a good thing. It means that I own up to it, and I'm ready to take my power back, get in the driver's seat and really go where I want to go.

We waste so much time on people who don't deserve it, efforts that bring no reward or offer anything of value to the world we live in, and just spend to much time in regrets of the past and worries over the future that we just let "The Now" evaporate right out from under us. So before getting to today's video, I would like to wrap this little block of thoughts up by repeating something someone shared on Facebook today.

It was a great insight that read:

"Your journey has molded you for the greater good. It was exactly what it needed to be; don't think you've lost time, it took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the now, and NOW is Right On Time..."

The Paperless Age

2011-12-06T13:03:00.001-04:00

Recently, I picked up an old book I haven't read in a while by one of my favorite authors, Richard Bach entitled "The Bridge Across Forever". The pages yellowed with age, and old bookmarks playing acrobatics in and out of the pages, I read through the pages as if reading them for the first time all over again. This in part because it has been so long since I actually read it, but I think that no matter how many times you read a book, you will always find something new, a message meant for just you, at exactly the right time.

"For the Love Of Story Time!"

That is the beauty of the written word, you can settle yourself in to your favorite nook or cranny, ball up next to a fire with your cup of hot cocoa, and not be disturbed as you slip into a completely different dimension, another world all its own with people, ideas and possibilities you never gave thought to before. So, you escape, shutting the noise and the chaos of this tired existence out for a while, enjoying your personal little trip through time and space.

With books, you can have complete creative license. You have your own idea what each character in the book looks like, sounds like, what it would be like to live where they live, and to exist in their world. When we listen to an audiobook, or go see the movie these things are taken away from us, and not nearly as detailed and engrossing. Although I enjoy listening to a good audiobook, and am a fan of a well-put-together cinematic masterpiece, I still get sad when I think of the decline in appreciation of the written word. These days we are so obsessed with 'going green', and saving paper, and speeding up the process of our every day lives, saving time... Hurry! Hurry, Rush, Rush RUSH!!! We lose appreciation for those quiet moments where we allow our minds to relax and we can quiet our inner being.

While I know that doomsday preachers, and governmental conspiracy theorists will say that it's already all gone down the drain, but it just takes one person to start a good trend. We should save some of these treasures, I think that the death of the Paperless age is only the beginning of worse things to come.

What's the hurry anyway? If you rush to the end and waste all the enjoyment of those wonderful moments spent savoring things that we love most, you're just racing towards "The End", and I for one am in no rush to get to that last page... Not just yet! ;-)

To Build A Fire

2011-11-29T15:41:00.001-04:00

It has been continually dreary since I put together my little "rain" playlist before the Thanksgiving holiday. Well with the exception of a couple of spots of sun shining through, it's been overcast, cloudy and cold. We actually had a bit of rain/snow mix last night and this morning. I'm also battling a cold I suppose, and since I had taken a couple of extra vacation days I guess it worked itself out. I hope I get over it quickly though, being sick sucks.

Thanksgiving came and went, and I'm trying to think towards the Christmas holidays, but fact is, last year I had a lot more perky feelings of hope, but we're hanging in there... me that is, and all of my "personalities" ha-ha.

So having recently cleaned the wood-burning heater, and gotten it primed for winter, last night we built a nice fire. I've been trying to keep one going today as well, since the temperatures haven't risen very high. I just can't believe that the year has zipped by us so fast...

Where does the time go?

Meanwhile, all we can do is stay warm and dry... have a little hot cocoa, and maybe a nice Fire (in whatever form you like most).

Melon Collie and the Hopefully Temporary Sadness

2011-11-23T10:40:00.001-04:00

It is the day before Thanksgiving, and the feelings of holiday dread are beginning to creep in. I tried to remain perked up and find things to keep me on a positive note, but I must admit that I'm feeling just plain Melancholy right about now. I guess it's a kind of emptiness, or loneliness that comes with the season for me.

Sometimes, although you will rarely hear me admit this, I envy friends, family and colleagues who have their normal homes and their normal families (with children) to go home to, they get a "security" that I don't get. Guess sometimes I would rewind if I could and make different choices. In fact, if I could go back some years knowing what I know now, I would definitely do some switching up and changing lanes...

We know that we're in this exact 'time and place' and situation for a reason, though, but that doesn't make the medicine any easier to swallow.

I do hope to get another chance at real happiness and fulfillment, I realize we choose these directions and we get navigate our paths, so next time I am given the golden egg, I'm going to crack it. These "missed boats" sink my very heart and flood my soul.

One of these days, I truly hope all my wishes come true. =)

Until then my love I will be here, patiently... Waiting...

Yes I Am Waiting...

Rainy Days

2011-11-22T13:39:00.001-04:00

The last couple of days here in Memphis have been rainy, so the streets are aglitter with the shimmery oil drippings of the commuters' vehicles, and chemicals of many colors, all so beautiful in their toxicity.

"How", we think "can pollution look so lovely?"

Rain, oh relaxing lullaby drizzling down, how you do remind me of my childhood. How safe we felt in the protection of our home and family... the lucky ones of us, I say as I'm sure that the rain may at this very moment reminding someone less fortunate than myself of other, darker childhood memories.

The memory floods back into my mind of a cool, misty morning... the rain was pouring down as my Mother made our way safely to the elementary school. There was something that comforted me, knowing that our classrooms would be dim as we watched the windows, painted with the blur of the colors outside soaked in raindrops.

The thunder and sounds of the storm gave me such a cozy feeling, as I eyed my Snoopy lunchbox, thermos filled with tea, knowing that my peanut butter and jelly sandwich waited patiently for me.Yes, I knew even then how to appreciate the blessings of the occasional wet wonderland.

Let our minds rewind as we enjoy a rainy childhood memory courtesy of "Pooh".

So the following verse was never really heartfelt for me:

"Rain, Rain go away...
Come again another day."

I was always happy on rainy days.

(Repeat of my post today from I Miss My Childhood Blog)

I Still Don't Like Mondays

2011-11-21T10:14:00.001-04:00

Any Day In Memphis...

The commute in this morning was treacherous at best, as the Memphis drivers panicked in lieu of the torrential downpour that we awoke to. There are two directions I can basically choose to navigate on the Interstate in Memphis. I can hit I-55 heading North to the back side of I-240, or just stay straight going East on I-240. This morning, I-55 North was gridlocked, so I remained heading east with the rain making for a touch and go drive, the idiot in front of me riding the bumper of the guy in front of him, and constantly hitting his brakes. Basically, to save my sanity I resolved myself to going under the speed limit and letting the morning morons pass and get out of my sight. The other route had been full of accidents, and given the mass hysteria, there was not much opportunity for me to have a slice of the road to myself. So I crept along at a hearty pace of 5-10 mph until we reached an area that loosened up a little. Despite some extremely admirable efforts of the Memphis Chapter of some modernized Gauntlet team, I arrived safely to my destination in one piece.

The day is a gloomy one, which is not something I generally deem as negative. I rather enjoy a nice rainy day. Preferably I don't have to drive in these storms much, as I once had a scary incident in which I hydroplaned off the Interstate during a bad rainstorm on the way to work back in the day when I was employed at one of the casinos.

There is just something so refreshing and relaxing about a cool, rainy day...

Rain! whose soft architectural hands have power to cut stones, and chisel to shapes of grandeur the very mountains. ~Henry Ward Beecher

However, with regard to Mondays... I can still find PLENTY to bitch about. Let's see... even with this being a short week due to the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday (a time to be thankful is an even BETTER time to bitch about the little things that bring us down hehe).

1. Monday sucks enough on its own compounded by rain and already brain-dead Memphis drivers.

2. Monday is the blade that chops your weekend away (for those of us who slave ourselves to a time-clock at any rate, and I already know some of you don't, so nye.)

3. The Monday people who are also morning people get in your face.

4. The already loud and annoying conference calls that people make first thing in the morning seem even louder and longer, so I can't have my essential quiet time.

5. I don't need other reasons, I just feel like bitching about Monday... 'Nuff said.

Since the week is cut in half, I guess it's not so bad... BUT STILLLLL >>>>

Friday Early Thanks

2011-11-18T13:52:00.001-04:00

Smell Ye The Roses!

Here at work today, we are having our office Thanksgiving dinner spread. I opted to bring Dolmas (greek "grape leaves"), which are usually a hit.

As I made myself responsible for the Grape Leaves, this prompted me to create an entire greek spread for last night's dinner.

So I put together Gyros, Dolmas, Tabouleh, Hummus, and this little Olives/Feta cheese mixture which is kind of a side you can eat along with this... included some Goat Cheese crumbles. At any rate, it's something I like a lot that I haven't had in a while. I'm just proud of myself for coming through on a bit of cooking. Usually, my motivation fails me.

The coming year is one of a lot of work for me in the realm of personal growth and getting where I need to go spiritually and physically here too. Seriously, a lot of work, decision-making and moving forward hopefully to a life filled with much-deserved happiness for once. I can only try hard and cross my fingers and keep plugging away.

Changes are never easy, and I sure wish they were easier. I know they're necessary... We can't flounder around in quick-sand forever, or we'll get pulled under.

I remain positive though, that's a good thing. The challenge is smelling the roses without getting stung on the nose again... and again... and again. =)

Facelift

2011-11-17T17:33:00.003-04:00

I was just reviewing the blog, and I have determined that if I want to get back into the swing of it, I may well benefit from a "facelift" on the blog, so I will redesign. I think I want to go back to something very simple and easier on the eyes... Stay tuned, I'll see what I can do.

**Update** Ok, so I went ahead and went with another template, which was pretty simple and seemed to change the format a little bit, I think I like it for now... I think that the blue is nice, and that the white background with the black text is refreshing and much easier to read.

This may be just the spark to get me rolling again on my writing and posting... So we'll see.

Thanks to everyone who hovers around and anticipates a post from me. I'm going to try to get back to good ones. Well, it will be a mixture of good ones, and as we all know, some days are just small notes to mention how things are going... But becoming more regular, yes--I can. =)

Fall Back

2011-11-16T12:22:00.000-04:00

We had the time change last weekend, and that always throws things off a bit. Although the fall is better because in essence, we actually get an hour back into our hot little hands. But what it does to the daylight I don't quite enjoy. It's already bright and shiny early in the morning, then by the time I get off work, the sun is nearly set or as it progresses, the sun is down completely. Yep, I'm just bitching about what I don't like about it... feel free to rag me (I know some of you who have nothing better to do will).

So I have said time and time again that I was gonna get back on track and blog more often... Have you guys totally given up on me? I haven't. I may get beat up, stomped down, and shaken up but I never give up. I know that eventually (maybe even this very moment) I will get back in the swing of daily writing.a

BBC suggested I pick a day that I do like and blog that day... well, I don't really have a favorite day. I can really kinda bitch about every day of the week... case in point:

Sunday: It's boring, nothing good comes on TV, I always end up doing laundry that day because I procrastinated the other 6 days of the week when I was dreading or irritated by them, and then I have to go to bed and dread waking up to start another shitty Monday.

Monday: It always sucks unless it's a holiday, in which case it basically just taints Tuesday, making it the Monday that I would have dreaded on Sunday. Sure I would have enjoyed that particular Sunday a little better except I was probably thinking about how Monday was gonna pass too quickly and there we'd be on Tuesday. =)

Tuesday: Not too bad, but still 3 days away from the weekend, making it just barely tolerable. Not much on TV that night either.

Wednesday: Usually band practice night when we are on our game, and also currently the night that "American Horror Story" comes on (FX Channel). So all-in-all, not the worst day of the week, but... y'know-why waste unnecessary energy. Heck I've got 2 more work days left.

Thursday: This is just an evil, taunting tease of a day. You can see Friday clearly on the Horizon, but you're already stressing about what you have to get done before the weekend is through, and also the multitude of things and people that are already getting on your nerves. The day glops by with the speed of Molasses (not to be confused with Mole Asses).

Friday: A brief flicker of joy marking the end of a long week, and then the beginning of the joyous weekend, a.k.a. "Lightening Round" because it zips by that fast. :)

Saturday: Nobody wants to wake up early on a Saturday, but unless you do, this day is shot quickly. Saturday you must pack everything you really want to do in! Unless you did your laundry earlier in the week, then you need to wash clothes, clean up, then get around to seeing everyone that you have neglected calling, visiting etc throughout the week. This can be a stressful day, making me wish I was back at work sometimes instead of the weekend because at least when I am at work, I have a good excuse as to why I can't go here, or do this or make time for _______. (Fill in the blank).

So there you go, a negativity filled week of dread, procrastination and forgetting about how blessed I am and living in the moment... haha. Anyways, I'm just making up shit that sounds cynical... although I do briefly experience thoughts such as this above, like I guess anyone does.

Anyway, this is just a block of ramblings... it's taken me three days to get it finished and it still didn't amount to anything interesting to read... haha.

So let's wait and see if I can manage one more post in the next week or so and find my groove again. After all, Groove is in the heart.

Groove is in the Heart - Dee-Lite by MovieFanQS

I Don't Like Mondays

2011-08-22T17:02:00.003-03:00

Short story today, it's Monday, I've been busy. The weekend was okay, went to the Casino mainly to see a band with my friend Glenda, didn't gamble, just ate at Bally's. Saturday night went to see "The Help" with my BFF, Tamra, good movie, I liked it anyway, thought it was a little crowded for my "unibomber" taste. :)

Then Sunday went to a sort of Wake for one of the members of our Motorcycle Riding group who passed away this past Thursday, so that was of course a downer, but he was suffering, and I'm glad he's in a better place.

Sunday night of course it was True Blood before bed, then a hard nights rest, before waking to yet another week of the grind.

No related music video to include today, nothing really comes to me. :)

Later on... AJ

Midnight Blue

2011-08-19T15:52:00.002-03:00

From time-to-time, I get all nostalgic and make music mixes and sometimes I find myself stuck in the 80s, a time when it was simple and still magical (for me at least, I don't need to know the cynical time it was for anyone else).

So I was making my friend Glenda an "Ultimate 80s Mix" the other day, and I found myself including the song "Midnight Blue" by Lou Gramm. I listened in to the words, and they were pretty cool.

Ain't got no regrets
And I ain't losin' track
Of which way I'm going
Ain't gonna double back
Don't want no misplay
Put on no display
An angel? No!
But I know my way
I used follow
Yeah, that's true.
But my following days are over,
Now I just gotta follow through
I remember what my father said
He said "~~Son~~ Girl, life is simple"
It's either cherry red or...

Midnight Blue...
Oh...
Midnight Blue...
Oh...
You were the restless one
And you did not care
That I was the troubled ~~boy~~ Girl...
Lookin' for a double dare
I won't apologize for
The things I've done and said
But WHEN I WIN YOUR HEART,
I'm gonna paint it cherry red.

I don't want to talk about it
What you do to me
I can't live without it
And you might think that
It's much too soon
For us to go this far
Into the...
Midnight Blue...

Things could be different
But that'd be a shame, 'cause
I'm the one who could feel the sun
Right in the pouring rain
I won't say where
And I don't know when
But soon there's gonna come a day
I'll be back again
Yeah, I'll be back for you
You see, I'm saving up my love...
Midnight Blue.

Sums it all up for me today... I'm posting, yeah, posting when I want to and feel like it, and I hope to make it more frequent, but I'm a moody HEFFAH, so I'll be back when I have something on my mind and the energy to type it out.

Later Foo...
HA.

Friday Groove

2011-08-05T13:16:00.004-03:00

It's felt like a pretty long week, with the heat, I have not had a very easy time waking up in the mornings. Nonetheless, it's finally Friday!

Guess you could say that I am doing an "okay" job of picking back up on the blog, even though I am merely posting a few scattered thoughts as I go along. Every day I learn to accept and love myself a little more, and more and enjoy the fact that the only person's opinion that matters about my thoughts, actions how I choose to live my life is ME. =)

Video thought for the day, SHAKE YO HEAD!!!

Summertime Blues

2011-08-02T09:31:00.008-03:00

The winds blow hot and ill in Memphis, the temps are literally at 99 - 101 degrees Fahrenheit (Heat Indices of 112-113+ notwithstanding). So we live our daily lives, trying not to pulverize one another, especially during times of road rage in our boiling, humid wonderland.

Right now, it's early, and so quiet the only noise for me is the ticking sound of my own typing. This is the time of day that I have to cherish as quiet time for me is a super-rare commodity... Just don't get enough!!

I sometimes wonder how we get ourselves into the situations we do, how our lives really come to this, and why some of us fell prey to the proverbial 'wrong turn at Albuquerque', as I always like to say.

Seriously, is ANYONE out there as happy as they seem? I look around me and other people seem to have everything they want, or things just fall in their laps, their greatest desires come true. I, on the other hand feel like I am constantly on my knees with folded hands, begging.

Sweeeeeeeeet Summer.

Video thought of the day:

Summertime Blues - Blue Cheer

Daily Grind

2011-08-01T11:57:00.003-03:00

Being the first of the month, I thought I'd give it a try, to start off the new month trying to write more. Maybe I can throw down a few thoughts, even if they're not "Novel Worthy", who says my blog posts have to be that earth shattering? It's just thoughts. No of course I can't voice my real mind here, but I can at least take the pressure off.

2011 has really zoomed by, and I swear I haven't made much progress on solving any of my issues, problems of the heart or made many positive changes. It's the 8th month of this year, and I'm still feeling about the same as I did on New Year's Eve when we started this joker.

Don't get me wrong, I have a lot of great days, and feel blessed and thankful for many experiences that make me smile and give my spirit true joy. They're not mine to keep though, they're not permanent, just temporary honeysuckle breezes, I have to inhale and commit them to memory so I can hold on to the feeling.

I've missed the boat in this lifetime, that's become pretty clear to me. These little canoes just keep flipping over and leaving me struggling to grasp for shore, and gasping for air. I'm blaming nobody but myself, and not asking for any advice or anyone's two cents, I'm just venting.

Jax Video Thought of the Day:

Never stop loving you baby by Carla Thomas

That's Monday...
Jax

Fixin Ta

2011-07-26T17:48:00.001-03:00

I'm about to begin blogging again, and I'm working as we speak on a new post. It has been a busy week at work though so my efforts have continuously been thwarted.

However, I ran across something today that inspired me, so I think I might find my inspiration to get back to writing more. It's not that I haven't wanted to, it's just been so hard to juggle creative time with everything that stifles me.

I'm not really in a 'funk' any longer, I feel fine, I'm just taking things moment to moment. Apologies to those of you who have missed me or worried about me, and also Thank you. You're appreciated greatly.

Now, please stay tuned. AJ will be right back after these messages...

June Bugs

2011-06-01T11:55:00.004-03:00

In an effort to glean a bit of inspiration for June, I filtered through some of my past writings, I have had quite a few poetic moments on this blog. I realize how badly my posts as of late surely pale in comparison. Believe me, some of my thoughts and moments could compete, but I can't publish it all. You will simply have to wait for my autobiography to be published. :)

This year is definitely zooming by, I feel like we just got through New Year's and already six months have evaporated before our very eyes. It has been an emotionally up and down time, sometimes I feel like I'm just floating helplessly in a creaky little boat on a stormy sea, but I'm hanging on to the boat, not the shore, popping my Dramamine and doing my best to ride the waves.

Everything comes gradually at its appointed hour, there's a bigger picture and plan. So, we keep on rolling along.

Shouts out today to Richie, it's his birthday and I hope he has a good one, still do my best to be a good friend and share the love as always, though we've been through a lot.

Ok well that about wraps up my thoughts for the day as it's all I have time for right now, maybe I will continue to ascend to bigger and better posts again, hang with me.

Happy June.

Where I Want To Stay

2011-05-26T22:22:00.004-03:00

There Are Days I Don't Feel Strong, When I've Given My Love To The Last Drop, and My Hand of Friendship I've Extended So Far It Is Sprained And Sore, and I Feel So Empty. I Give of Myself, Not Expecting Return, But Sometimes Even I Deserve A Refill. :-(

Thanks, my blog friends who send me little notes trying to do just that... You are loved back. I'm sorry that I am not so strong, as some days are harder than others. Some of those days I feel like writing it out, here, and some I just don't dare.

I wrote a poem today... It goes a little something like this:

I cut open my heart
and allow you to look upon
the very beat of it;
Raw, fresh and blood-laden
my pain belongs
to me, and me alone--
For the beat of my heart,
it has no Home...
and loneliness is
a dark and dreary shack
where I rest
my head, for now.
As my weary eyes
watch in wonder
while another bright sunrise
fades into a stormy night,
I scramble for a flicker
trying to hold on to the light.
If by chance,
I can close one eye
to sleep right where I lay,
It is you who lives
inside my dreams,
where I want to stay...
where I want to stay.

<3 <3 <3

Alive and Kicking

2011-05-05T23:14:00.003-03:00

I'm taking things slowly but surely, as in baby steps... Here I am posting again rather quickly! Although I don't have a lot to say right this moment, except that I am glad that the weekend is near, I dropped by to let you all know that I'm Alive and Kicking... It is what it is, and I am working on it all. I'll keep you posted. ;-)

Cursed

2011-05-04T11:23:00.005-03:00

Still not doing so well on the blogging, I am trying though. I just can't muster up enough to say but I haven't given up, so don't give up on me.

Today I post this song, as it is how I feel at the moment. Sometimes we love people, and they don't or cannot return the favor, but love given is never lost and I know that. When I DO love, it is with all of my heart, full-force, and it is REAL. Still, throughout our lives we have all experienced unrequited love and it sucks.

Here are the lyrics to the song for lazy people, or those who don't like the style of music. The artist is "Vivian Green", the song is called "Cursed". Have a day. :-|

"Cursed"

I'm cursed with loving you baby
It hurts cause you'll never know it
I was put here to hopelessly love you
And you ain't thinking of me
that's the torture I go through

It's been a long long time now
And I'm still trying to get you out
of my head, of my heart, of my whole damn soul
This love is still lingering it's getting old
But it ain't dying, it's not even trying
And I can't fight it, I just bury it
at the bottom hoping you might find
You are my love, were my first
And now this love is just a curse
Oh, Yeah

I'm cursed with loving you baby
It hurts cause you'll never know it
I was put here to hopelessly love you
And you ain't thinking of me
that's the torture I go through

I don't know why I even called,
Thinking our time has come again
Cause the first time wasn't right
No we were too young
I was too serious, you wanted to have fun
And now I look at us and see
How good it could be
If we could only get past the past
And see... That the love we had is there
if we try it could last.

I'll be always loving you,
I'll be always loving you,
No matter what or where...
I'll always care!

< 3 > L 4 L

Lost In The Shuffle

2011-03-18T16:10:00.003-03:00

Well I am slowly but surely trying to pick up and come by and post. I still haven't had enough time to get everything packed into one day that I need lately. Still under a few different fogs. I'm trying though. Richie's grandmother passed away yesterday, and there have been a multitude of work projects weighing down.

I thought I would pop in quickly and just say hello to my wonderful readers who have thought enough to stick around even though my absence has been longer than I intend most days. The weekend is here, this is Friday so why not have a very sexy, romantic song to put us all in a steamy mood for the weekend... or not. Still, I do love this song, "Lost In You" by Tank.

Whatever you do this weekend, enjoy and stay safe (especially anyone who's doing left-over St. Patty celebrations).

Bold As Love

2011-03-03T17:03:00.007-04:00

Do you guys even read this crap? Dunno, maybe the right person who needs it will get something from reading it.

Being "Back" as I said before, is still a bit of a hit and miss for me. It's not been for a lack of trying, and I still hope to get back to writing a lot more. As with anything, it's a process and we have to take it one day at a time. I'm not going to lie, there have been many things in my life that were probably more than noteworthy over the last few months, but unfortunately they are things I just can't write about publicly. They're things that are best-kept to my private journals, which don't actually exist mind you, but I really should go back to writing my journals. I think it would help me immensely.

I guess life is all about changes. Sometimes they're good, and they feel fantastic, and sometimes they feel like someone took a lead pipe to your knee caps and ripped out your liver with a fork. But we have to go through them, and we have to sit and take what comes our way and either sink or learn to swim, quickly.

I don't want to drown, believe me, and sometimes lately I have felt like I was drowning. It sucks the big one.

Love is a big part of who I am, and I have such a great amount of love in my heart to give, it's not even funny. So for it to go to waste, that hurts me immensely. Some days I am able to keep a smile on my face, and others I just feel like giving up altogether. I am in pain.

O.k., so when do we know when to really throw in the towel? Or do we throw in the towel? When is the time right to cut our losses and stop trying to pick up the same old broken pieces off the floor, and cut ourselves trying to put it all back together?

To me, love is bold, love is unafraid, love can conquer anything. 'Love doesn't quit, and never gives up.' Right? Right. Real love wins out, it comes back to you when you let it go, we're not supposed to have to sweat any of the "small stuff", and it's not supposed to be this hard!

I'm just trying to be a little bit more like Love I guess.

Take it away Jimi!

A few quotes that may further illustrate what's on my heart today I guess...

"You say that love is nonsense. ... I tell you it is no such thing. For weeks and months it is a steady physical pain, an ache about the heart, never leaving one, by night or by day; a long strain on one's nerves like toothache or rheumatism, not intolerable at any one instant, but exhausting by its steady drain on the strength." ~Henry Brooks Adams

"In our ludicrous efforts to 'change' and be perfect, we try to fashion a perfect world for ourselves. We start to imagine that we are actually in control of our world, which is further from reality than an all-parrot moon landing. The universe, our universe, is out of our control. We live on a speck drifting around in an infinite vacuum with countless trillions of other specks. Our world is in a perpetual state of perfect chaos and entropy, with everything falling apart and dying and being born haphazardly. Meanwhile, we try to make life as neat and clean and orderly as a computer research facility, when in fact it is more like a junkyard. It always has been, and it always will be, no matter how much fussing and sweating and striving we do to make it different." ~Robert White

"Always remember to slow down in life; live, breathe, and learn; take a look around you whenever you have time and never forget everything and every person that has the least place within your heart."

"I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be."

...And to YOU, and you know who you are... I Love You forever even if that means nothing at all, or if it helps you to be happy, good. I want that, I do, so don't get it twisted. If it's not possible for you to be truly happy with ME, just at least go and be truly happy.

The B**** Is Back

2011-02-08T11:39:00.003-04:00

Oh yes, things have been quiet around the Forrest for a good little while. You could hear the crickets, and I haven't said much lately, but I'm back and intend to get back in action and start writing. So look forward to this, maybe I can pull some interesting stories out of my hat. Meanwhile, as with any good program, we'll be back after a word from our sponsor...

Pocket Full Of Change

2010-12-06T12:15:00.003-04:00

If I had a handful of change for every time I have talked on this blog in the last few months about "Change", I would... have a lot of damn change.

"Change has a considerable psychological impact on the human mind. To the FEARFUL it is threatening because it means that things may get worse. To the hopeful it is encouraging because things may get better. To the confident it is inspiring because the challenge exists to make things BETTER." ~King Whitney Jr.

Please stand by for a blog post that won't be perfectly written, just as my life is not perfectly written, and just like anything about life on this Earth is not perfectly written. However, I am of the opinion that things which are not always perfectly written, end up in most cases a much better read anyway!

OK to start, I am not happy with myself for neglecting my writing, blogging. I've always said I enjoy writing immensely, so to neglect it is to neglect an important part of myself. If anyone is reading this, it means you haven't given up on me, which is good because I don't give up on my loved ones, and most of you who put up with me are loved ones, and damn lucky ones at that! :)

So life has thrown out a few curve-balls, fast-balls and even screwballs along with a good many uppercuts and jabs. I'm getting pretty agile in my old age honestly. Did I expect any less? In all honesty, I must say at an early age, YES because I was led to believe as a child how great life was going to be as an adult. I believed that, as I trusted my parents with my life, but my inner child must have known better because I also clung to her, as she clung on to me for dear life.

That's o.k., we help one another through these changes, and when something feels a little too tough to take, she and I pop popcorn and lock ourselves in our room and watch old Disney Movies. It works.

My point, however idiotic it may seem to those of you reading this is Change is a part of life. Now depending on whether we feel 'short changed', or given back TOO MUCH Change is the deciding factor between a spending spree or opening up a 'Can of Whoop Ass', but it all balances out somehow, so when Life dishes out these butt-loads of change go on a Spending Spree!!!

"Die when I may, I want it said of me by those who knew me best, that I always plucked a thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow." ~Abraham Lincoln

Take it away David...

Them's Fightin Words

2010-11-09T18:28:00.004-04:00

Feeling "ok" today, nothing to really make much note of... however, I feel a little mean. You know what I mean?

If you have anything smart to say, then my response is...

Yeah Me :)

The Big Chill

2010-11-07T11:40:00.003-04:00

It's getting colder, everywhere... Chillier days, falling leaves, life's chill. I still have my own warm heart to keep me going, that is if I can keep the fire burning. People do make it hard sometimes. We have to rise above things, and it's not always easy.

Let me digress... Let's talk about something else besides my continuous growing pains. I can only imagine how boring that gets. Boy could I write a good book right now though. Going to get on that project soon... bet that. :)

The weather has been giving me the lethargic and lazy qualities, so it's been a challenge for me to get everything accomplished. I have to be very tough on myself at times to meet my deadlines and get important work finished.

There's really not much to report if I am not complaining about the current state of affairs in life, so I will just say that I am trying to get some work done, and listening to my Pandora Radio on my TV. Music always does help productivity for me. We'll see. I'll report more shortly.

That's all for now my little pretties.

Dia De Los Muertos

2010-11-02T23:58:00.006-03:00

Hope everyone had a great, safe and fun Halloween weekend... Mine was pretty nice. Still I struggle to write, and search aimlessly for my muse. Maybe my muse is as dead as my heart sometimes? I don't know, we'll see. Moment to moment and I will continue each day to try a little harder to get back to full creative mode.

Meanwhile, today I would like to pay tribute to our loved ones who have passed on, and remember them, celebrate them and thank them for having been a part of our lives and continuing to be so, in our hearts, in our souls, in our smiles, they live forever.

I would like to share a quote given me by a good friend (niece's boyfriend), basically a family member (if you will), Eddy.

"En la noche de la muerte, la esperanza ve una estrella, y escuchar el amor puede escuchar el susurro de un ala."

It means...

[In the night of death, hope sees a star, and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing.]

As I may have mentioned before, even as we walk through shadows, we should be uplifted with the thought that it means light is shining not so far away. So keep moving forward, and we'll get there soon enough. Never, ever give up.

I haven't.

Love,

Aunt Jackie

"Every moment is but another chance to turn it all around."

Circle Of Friends

2010-10-21T16:25:00.003-03:00

So it seems that every day people new and people old weave themselves in and out of my life, leaving me wrapped up in the web that they have weaved about me and dulling my senses. I can only walk moment to moment and search the shadows, in which I have always hidden so that I may find myself and take me home.

AJ

Forty-Two

2010-10-20T16:16:00.007-03:00

Joyful as the thought may be of having all of the answers to everything, how much fun would that truly be? As painful as some of our lessons in life are, if you knew the end result of any given experience the odds are that you would avoid many endeavors that otherwise gave you a lot of joy, love and pleasure. You'd really miss a lot of those 'in between gifts'. So all's well that ends, well, even not-so-well.

Forty-two is just about as good an answer to the question of life as any I can think of, so you will just have to accept that and continue licking your wounds, and continue experiencing things that are not always joyful, magical or fairy tale endings. You'll thank me as well as yourself later for allowing yourself to live life.

Move forward, unafraid, knowing that in times of trouble you're equipped with an armor far tougher than you realized and bear a strength that has saved itself for this very moment.

Remember, "Change is neither good nor bad. It just is." That's right, it just IS and it is inevitable. What you do with the change (what you spend all of that spare change on is up to the individual. You can make it positive or negative)!

So I am waking up each day, sometimes not knowing just what's going to happen next, but I embrace the challenges that may come to pass, and know that I am going to emerge a stronger, more confident and radiant being on this sometimes-not-so-shining planet.

Each of us has different paths, although we may be traveling the same streets and highways with kindred spirits from time-to-time, and oftentimes many of us take separate exits. So, all those questions you have about your life? Only YOU can answer!

Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything (42)

Spanish Castle Magic

2010-10-19T19:22:00.001-03:00

Dragonflies are something very magical... This must be true since they're one of the few enormous insects that I am enamored of and I do not run screaming from. Yes, I think they hold many ancient secrets of the universe ;) Read Dragonfly Symbolism.

It just seems like a good day to take flight on the back of one of these mysterious creatures. What say you!?? Let's go!

It's very far away
It takes about a half and a day to get there
If we travel by my uh, dragon-fly
No it's not in Spain
But all the same you know, it's a groovy name
And the wind's just right.
Hey !

Hang on my darling
Hang on if you wanna go
Here it's a really groovy place
It's uh, just a little bit of uh, said uh, Spanish Castle Magic.

The clouds are really low
And they overflow with cotton candy
And battle grounds red and brown
But it's all in your mind
Don't think your time on bad things
Just float your little mind around
Look out ! Ow !

Hang on my darling, yeah
Hang on if you wanna go
Get on top, really let me groove baby with uh Just a little bit of Spanish Castle Magic. Yeah baby,
here's some
Yeah, ok babe, ok
It's still all in your mind babe
Oww !
Yeah !

Ah !

Hang on my darling, hey
Hang on, hang on if you wanna go
And it's happening, oh no, damn hey ! That's right baby, listen
A little bit of Spanish Castle Magic
Hey !
Little bit of Spanish Castle Magic
Hey hey !
I can't uh, sing this song, no
Yeah, ok baby
Get on baby
Yeah
It's all in your mind baby
Little bit of daydream here and there
Oh !
Yeah !
Ooh ! yeah !
Ow !
Ev'rything's gonna be alright!

Gettin Back In The Saddle

2010-10-06T21:38:00.003-03:00

All I seem to be able to say whenever I come by to leave a post these last couple of months is "Things have been crazy and I haven't had time to think/post etc". As much as I would like to stop saying that, it's been crazy for sure in all areas of life.

Still, my longing to write, and to write something more than status messages for my blog is strong and I want to resume writing things that I enjoy here.

My attempt to try getting back into the swing of things, and get back to "Jackie", even more than ever before is in progress. I am here, I have been digging deep down inside myself to keep 'her' from drowning. Nothing I could say here would merit just a blog, just rest assured that everything that I have gone through lately and in the past too will become part of my book.

I've decided as soon as my feet are back on the ground enough to move forward, and I get some other projects done that I have promised to people, and that I have been trying to get done, then I am going to begin my own book. I don't know what direction it will go, but it will be time to start.

Oftentimes I think my life has been boring and without any interesting stories, but when I was with a friend of mine recently, and exchanging titillating tales (as girls often do), I realized that I have a great deal of material to entertain!

My concern never lies with creativity, or finding the words to start this, my only wonder is 'just exactly how is this insane little tale going to end?'. It's destined to be a crazy work, that's for sure.

Window Seat

2010-09-14T15:39:00.000-03:00

My feelings for today can be summed up by the lyrics, not necessarily the content of the video for this song (although I am not ruling that out at this point). :)
Enjoy "Window Seat" by Erykah Badu

Happy Labor Day

2010-09-05T14:44:00.006-03:00

I know I have really taken a dive lately in the way of my blogging, but I seriously have had too much going on in all areas of my life to think straight, or think of much to blog about, or much that I can blog about too.

No matter, I am still around and I am not quitting, just having to collect thoughts and do some soul searching, rejuvenate and regroup I guess. No fear, you can't keep Aunt Jackie down for long... just fun low on fuel every once in a while.

So this is Labor Day weekend, and it's passing off faster than it was supposed to. There is no "True Blood" this weekend, so my B.F.F., Tamra and I are not happy about that. :) Means we don't get to have our usual Day-after True Blood discussions, plus when it returns next week for the finale, we will be disappointed it's over and have to wait until next summer to get the next season. Crazy sounding, I know. But it's one of those shows for us.

Enjoy whatever you are doing this weekend to celebrate your holiday off (if it is a holiday off), or if you don't have to live life holiday to holiday and paycheck to paycheck, then consider yourself lucky and just send a few happy, healing thoughts the way of the ones of us who still do (or maybe even do some work and think of us). Thank you on behalf of us all. Enjoy and make the most of every moment on this rock, because you seriously never know what's going to happen next.

Party on, and much love,

Your Aunt Jackie

For the hard working peeps out there...

Blog Fog

2010-08-23T21:04:00.004-03:00

I've been in a fog, haven't had much to write home about really. The heat, life, and all of the little 'this and that' have had my mind spinning around so I have been moving in high gear, and physically unable to sit and write lately.

I'll be back on form soon, I owe it to myself since I love to write, not just because I hope you comment, even though I do hope you comment.

Reading through old stuff, it would be nice to find something interesting... an old letter, more of my old teenage journal entries, something that might be entertaining. Maybe more voice (podcast) entries, but nobody really comes around enough to say, "Yeah, do ____ (fill in the blank)."

We used to have a blog-hood, people hanging out and buzzing around each other more often, now it's more like those projects that end up deserted and boarded up... kinda depressing.

"Radiation Blues" by Dax Riggs

Bury this and the rhythm of breath, there is only death
Maybe you're dead and ya just don't know
A shadow dressed only in sorrow
Tomorrow might not exist and ya should've been dead
Should've been dead like ten times over
Like ten times over
Should've been dead like ten times over
By the hand of your lover
By the side of the river should've been dead
Bury this song and the rhythm of breath
There is only death
There is only death, only death
These radiation blues sister
Gonna make me true
Movin' through the bones of you
These radiation blues
Movin', movin', movin', movin'

Time For A Cool Change

2010-08-16T23:26:00.004-03:00

This has been a really long, hot summer to me... I read someone's status earlier that stated they had complained about the heat in their neck of the woods, and they thanked Mississippi for reminding them of what heat really was. I concur. So, no I haven't felt a lot of relief from these insane temperatures, and it has had the effect on me of making me not want to do much of anything really. I've not even felt like blogging the last few days. I honestly don't feel like it now, I just wanted to say a few words.

Today, my main objective and accomplishment was getting over a raging headache, so I wasn't feeling well for most of the day. I finally took enough Advil and a hot mineral bath, and ate a bit of supper and feel kind of human again.

In short, I can't wait for fall... late this afternoon when I stepped outside it actually felt pleasant and not like I was sitting between Satan's legs.

There is hope yet. Time For A Cooooool Change.

Dream, Dream, Dream

2010-08-08T18:07:00.007-03:00

Today I looked down into the small deep eyes of an innocent puppy, and she only reminded me of all the spirit and soul that truly exists in the world. As small as her little canine eyes appeared, they were a vast universe of wonder and love. She looked directly into mine, unfaltering, as I sat still and stared into hers for a silent moment.

It was as if they were a portal to an entirely bigger better world... perhaps they are.

Yes my weekend has been o.k. so far, I visited my mother and I managed some time to myself to breathe. My mind has been quite tangled up in a fantasy world the last few days, and I cannot lie, I am not upset with that fact.

Some might think that staying in a fantasy world, and not "growing up" would impede your adult life and cause you not to fit into your 'adult costume'. But you see, I can take care of business, do whatever 'big kid' things I need to do, and still revert back to my flights of fancy and my world of dreaminess.

It's a special, if not rare quality if I do say so myself.

Now, let's have a quick moment of silence to allow the Negative Ninnies their chance to insert a cynical and sarcastic comment.

Thank you in advance for those, they are duly noted and promptly tossed out into a recycle container where I then have them turned into fertilizer for my lawn or other greenery.

Environmentalists can be proud.

For the rest of us, who are trying to ascend and become the best 'we' that can be, and we are spending our time wisely, filling our glasses full of joy and not poison, then we can move on to more positive thoughts, such as the following, by ME:

The only thing that makes anything IMPOSSIBLE is your belief that it is impossible. You already have everything that you want. How do you see it? Maybe all you need is a shift in perspective...

It's All In How You Look At Things!

That's right, it's Sunday and if you are here, then you might as well enjoy a bit of inspiration from your good ol' Aunt Jackie.

More favorite 'points to ponder', and a magic evening to you all! ;)

Don't miss the donut by looking through the hole. ~Author Unknown

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. ~Ludwig Börne

There are some remedies worse than the disease. ~Publilius Syrus

You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep. ~Navajo Proverb

We are spirits clad in veils. ~Christopher P. Cranch

Business Time and Other Sexy Goodness

2010-08-04T23:57:00.003-03:00

With it being "Hump Day", I felt like doing something extra sexy special for you guys, and myself of course. It's been a busy week and a hot week too, so we need some relief! lol

So here we go. A few videos that I think are appropriate and fun for this fine Wednesday (a.k.a. in many areas of the world, "Hump Day"). Get yours! ;)

"Business Time" by Flight Of The Concords (Just damn funny)

"She's Tight" by Cheap Trick (AJ kickin it Old Skool)

"Bad Habits" by Maxwell (such a friggin sexy video!)

and finally...

"The Humpty Dance" by Digital Underground (Words are not necessary)

Hope you guys got a kick out of these, or at least enjoyed.

What Is Life?

2010-08-02T14:05:00.003-03:00

Simple thoughts I would like to share today in the words of good ol' Mother Teresa (even though I am not Catholic or anything), I think these words are quite effective... Enjoy!

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.
Mother Teresa

While I'm at it, why not a couple more?

Meditate. Live purely. Be quiet. Do your work with mastery. Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine.
Buddha

The healthiest response to life is joy.
Deepak Chopra

When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...
And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life.
Monty Python's Life of Brian

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth.
Chinese Proverb

Love,
Aunt Jackie

Here's Mud In Your Eye

2010-07-29T12:17:00.004-03:00

I often like to share cool links and articles that I find. So today I'm going to share something from an idea from a piece of Junk Mail I received this morning; yes I sometimes glean cool things from junk mail, although I don't actually click on the junk mail link for security reasons. I'll usually "GOOGLE" it and find out more. So kids, that's my reminder for you today always to be careful of what you click on, things that people send you, etc. If it looks odd, or seems like spam or a virus, just DELETE it. You should be able to tell.

Anyway, this interesting piece came from something that was titled "The Photoletariat". I was intrigued, so I looked up the word and found http://thephotoletariat.com/. One of their photos was from The Boryeong Mud Festival (Boryeong, South Korea). I had never heard of this, but found it intriguing and there are more photos at the above link.

I always enjoy reading about celebrations and ideas from other cultures. Enjoy.

Day After My Own Heart

2010-07-28T21:44:00.009-03:00

Did not realize but today is
National Milk Chocolate Day!

What a delicious sounding holiday!

As far as the last few days goes, as you can see I fell off of my daily posting for NaBloPoMo, and I do regret it. But I just got really busy with other things and was unable to keep up over the weekend and through the start of this week. I should have known, but I thought it was at least worth the fun of trying.

So it's too far gone and I am not going to back-track and try to cheat or anything by filling in lost posts. Besides, wouldn't be quality that way.

Well, it's Hump Day, so hope all is well with you guys... Here's to the rest of the week! Rock it, & here's a head start. "Givin The Dog A Bone" - How appropriate for Hump Day. ;)

Friday Night Videos

2010-07-23T18:25:00.001-03:00

This is a blast from the past, just wondered if anybody else remembers?

Happy Friday!

Thirsty

2010-07-22T21:02:00.006-03:00

For those of us who are a slave to the grind, we've almost made it through another work week, that's a great blessing! For those of you who don't have to report to anyone for your paycheck, well it's another beautiful day, so enjoy!

Richie went back to work today after Monday's oral surgery, still felt a bit loopy he said but all-in-all it has been a swift recovery. I'm glad... I did the best I could to take care of him.

So the weekend is in sight, and I'm trying to think of fun things to do. It's so hot weather-wise, and I don't mean to complain but I hate feeling sweaty and smelly. I like being pleasantly fragrant and sassy.

Nothing much to report otherwise, so I will let you go with a few cute graphics about the heat, one of which I stole from BBC's blog again (he always has the funniest cartoons). So there you go. Happy Thursday.

v

I Write Like

2010-07-21T10:40:00.004-03:00

This is a fun little gadget to entertain all of you readers out there who love to write! A coworker passed this along to me, and I thought I would share.

Basically, what you do is simply input a few lines, paragraphs, or whatever--a sample of your writing and hit the "Analyze" button, and it will tell give you the name of an Author with whom you might share a common writing style.

I tried with several different pieces of my writing, and got various authors, but the one that popped up more often than not was, Stephen King! Pretty cool.

Anyway, hope you enjoy.

I write like
Stephen King

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

Missing Days

2010-07-20T12:43:00.000-03:00

O.k., so I got a little caught up and missed a post. It's harder than it seems, but I'm not totally giving up. I'm still here, plugging away and trying to post each day, even if it is a little blurb about what I'm up to.

This week, it is just work, and as I stated before I had to look out for Richie after having his Wisdom Teeth extracted. He's doing o.k. though, just another busy week.

Will report more fun stuff as the week comes to a close. Happy Mid-week. Hope all of you are doing well.

Sunday Bloody Sunday

2010-07-18T21:59:00.002-03:00

Simply the fact that my "True Blood" show comes on tonight thrills me, is that so bad? I mean, I don't see any harm in wasting time especially on things that bring us joy.

Today's motorcycle ride went well, I enjoyed it, everyone landed back home in one piece (as far as I know), and I know Richie and I did. I have photos from that, but won't get to put any of those up for a couple days.

The ride was nice, scenic, sweaty and I was glad to get back home. The buffet was good too, so I have to put this day on the shelf as a perfect end to a really nice weekend.

I'll update more later. Enjoy your Sunday evening. -AJ

Saved Excuses

2010-07-17T21:54:00.000-03:00

Would've posted sooner but went to my Mom's house and then had to prepare for Sunday plans to go Motorcycle riding in Arkansas. So there, I have my excuse!!! :)

Speaking of excuses, I wanted to post an example letter of excuse like a parent would write to their child's school to make a funny for this post, but it didn't quite work out. However, should I be upset at all that my blog is the first thing that pulls up when you type the words "please excuse jackie explosive diarrhea" into the search?

It's funny, I'm gonna go ahead and laugh.

Ctrl / Alt / Delete!

2010-07-16T13:00:00.001-03:00

Though being sentimental is one of my good traits, it is also somewhat of a curse. I'm not quite a "Hoarder" like you see on those scary reality t.v. shows, but I do hold on to wayyy to much useless junk, and disposables.

For instance, there are several blogs I have linked that have long moved on from the world of blogging, or have gone private, or even have simply deleted their blog. It is high time that I clean house, and stop wishing that these people would somehow miraculously reappear in the blogosphere.

Besides, if they still read my blog, or care then I guess they will show up one day and leave me a comment. So I am cleaning up the link list and if you ever want to link with me, let me know. I'm always glad to make new acquaintances. I do the best I can to get around and visit and I try to leave comments when I have time. I LOVE receiving comments as well, but I don't get very many (much to my dismay).

So, Here is a good funny that I saw shared over on BBC's 'Spirit's Doings' blog. Since I dislike Rush Limbaugh, I got a good giggle out of it.

Guess it's time to begin the WEEKEND!! I hope you all have a great one, and I will continue tomorrow with more titillating daily posts. :)

My Sharona

2010-07-15T00:13:00.000-03:00

Saved from my Music Vault: My Sharona, originally done by "The Knack", but I happen to like this version recorded by Veruca Salt. They made it sound a bit edgier. To each his own, but enjoy:

What's been happening the last couple of days you ask? Well just finishing up the work week, really, and Mr. J has gone and had his teeth xray'd in preparation of having his remaining wisdom teeth pulled. This will happen sometime on Monday. Sunday we are supposed to go on our ride to Crowley's Ridge with the guys, weather permitting and all. We've missed the last couple so I am raring to go.

So looks like I'll be doing my preparations for that, seeing Mom, trying to clean, practicing and going on a bike trip all in one weekend. Busy one, me. But I have been trying to hold fast to the daily posting. Barely getting by on it but trying. :)

Been a good week, I'm trying to stick with a more positive attitude and a better path. That's not easy some days, so wish me complete luck! It's all in each of us, just have to hold the faith that things will work out well, and keep taking steps forward. I know it's hard, and some of us are more prone to negative thoughts than others, but think of it this way (this means you too Furtheron, and me, and a few others too), the feeling negative and self-loathing hasn't really worked for us so far (has it?), so what have we got to lose from just trying to think more positively? It can either do nothing, or it can bring you GOOD things. However, just like everything it may take a little patience and it might take more than just doing well for a day or two.

Perseverance and REAL intent are the key words. You have to feel good and MEAN it, ok? Stop hating yourself, and open up your heart to let in good vibrations, and love. There are bad things out there, and we can't change it all, and there are some things that we can't control or do anything about. The one thing we CAN change, and control and IMPROVE? Ourselves.

Just Feel Good... It's contagious.

Try and try again, besides... what else do you have to do while you're flip flopping about the planet? :)

Saved: The Secret

2010-07-14T09:09:00.000-03:00

Just wanted to share this. Kim let me borrow her copy, and it is really great. If you get a chance to watch this, do.

Get Us To The Geek

2010-07-13T20:40:00.009-03:00

Quite a lesser known fact about July 13th is that today is National Embrace Your Geekiness Day. I wish I'd known earlier, but of course what I do in a day is geeky enough, so I guess I wouldn't have a need to go overboard. However, if you are reading this and still have time, feel free to let your geek flag fly.

Helpful Geek Links:

Geek according to Wikipedia

Embrace Your Inner Geek

Embrace Your Geekiness Day - How To Celebrate

How To Tell The Difference Between Nerds and Geeks

Anyway, I just thought that was fun to share. I heard it when I was listening to Doreen Virtue's Daily Oracle Card Reading, just something I enjoy that gives me a lift. Don't we all need a lift sometimes... and the answer to that is 'yes' for you 'Doubty McDoubtfires'.

I think that's enough geek for one day, so I am signing out. Enjoy, and remember that any day is a good day to embrace the geek within.

Lost Magic Of Summer

2010-07-12T01:00:00.003-03:00

Although I tend to hate the heat of a Memphis Summer now, if I take a break from the noisy buzz of the daily adult grind, and take a deep breath, I can remember some of the magic that Summer could conjure up as a child.

Here are a few of the things that summer meant to me as a child growing up in the south.

Catching Fireflies

Going Barefoot (ah my soul)!

Riding In Back Of The Old Pickup Truck

The Smell of Freshly Cut Grass!

Watermelon, and sometimes
biting off more than one could chew...

Oh Summer heat, still deliciously sweet if you can find just the right way of looking at it.

I Miss My Childhood,

Aunt Jackie

(repeat from "I Miss My Childhood" -linked above)

It Is What It Is

2010-07-11T13:29:00.005-03:00

Maybe I had a better night's sleep, despite the bad dream but I feel a little more energy today. The heat of summer seems to take most of my extra energy away. Fall and winter are just my cup of tea, although early spring will do nicely. No, I've never been a fan of the dog days of summer... especially not around Memphis. Just gotta sweat it out.

I'm craving warm, flaky biscuits and gravy... I wish I had gone to Mom's last night and I could have eaten that for breakfast this morning. As it stands now, I haven't eaten anything yet, and I should... I've waited too long since awakening.

Today I have plans to have coffee with Kim, and I know what you're thinking, 'You just finished bitching about how hot it was and how miserable you were with summer heat, but yet you will go for a coffee date?' Well, the answer is yes... Coffee does nicely any time of the year, it can cool you in the summer and warm you in winter. I got this from my Mother, and it rings true, for us at least. So I will have coffee with Kim, and I get to hear a few details about her recent travels. If I can't be on the road and be free right now myself, at least I can live vicariously through her adventures.

Then, tonight I look forward to another episode of True Blood, and begin another week on the grind. I realize that I'm random with posting, sometimes great stories, sometimes funnies, sometimes just a mundane recap of what's going on in my life, but that's me, my blog, and it is what it is.

Saturdays in Summer

2010-07-10T13:23:00.002-03:00

Woke up wayyy too early, then we went to the grocery store and picked up a few essentials. Mostly low-carb since Richie is back on that kick again. After doing some dishes, and a few things around the house, I fell victim to quite a long nap. I guess I hadn't slept enough since I arose too early.

Richie went to class, I played Wii a bit, then finished another load of dishes (yeah I had gotten quite behind this last week). Took a nice long soak too, which I am always up for.

Had some supper and Richie's Brother and his wife came by after, so we watched a couple movies.

Somewhere within the 2nd movie, sleep found me again.

Ahhh Saturdays in the Summer heat, always looking for the cool on the other side of the pillow.

I Just Don't Understand...

2010-07-09T15:48:00.005-03:00

WHY is it that after I take a bubble bath, the tub is shiny and clean and perfect, but when my husband takes a bath, he leaves it looking like someone slaughtered a bear?

So yes I have been trying my best to post daily, but it has been a challenge. That's why you are seeing short but sweet entries, which I hope are still enjoyable and entertaining.

That's really it for today, except I will leave you with a Cat Funny... if you are married, or just like cats, you should get a giggle out of it.

MEN!

Thursday's Child

2010-07-08T03:58:00.000-03:00

Who doesn't love Bowie? I give you... "Thursday's Child".

Saved by Jesus

2010-07-07T16:49:00.003-03:00

It happened right on time for this guy!

Colt .45 Commercial

2010-07-06T16:25:00.000-03:00

Saved Commercials. Guess at one time, Colt .45 was more 'high brow'.

Saved by Love

2010-07-05T22:53:00.006-03:00

If you haven't heard "I Love You" enough lately, this is my gift2 you.

I thought I was going to think this video was lame, but just hearing all those voices saying "I Love You" was kind of moving... it's a little infectious.

And who can love us more than Animals??

Listen to Mishka the Husky say "I Love You".

And you know that I love you all, right?? So you're very blessed ;)

I'm sure the Negative Negatasons will have something to say now, right??

The Best Way To Predict The Future Is To Create It.

2010-07-04T10:50:00.005-03:00

YOU are psychic! I bet you had no idea that it could be this easy, but it is. All you have to do is relax and listen closely, and raise your awareness. Find moments of quiet throughout each day to sit by yourself and just "BE". Have faith in yourself and your intuition. You hold every answer, all you have to do is apply within.

Today I merely offer you this wonderful "Quote of the Day", if you had any doubts to your own potential:

"The best way to predict the future is to create it."

It's Right There In Your Hands! ;)

Saved By The Prince

2010-07-03T10:40:00.006-03:00

Peta's "Sexiest Vegetarian Alive"? Refuses to eat 'anything with parents'? Two more reasons that Prince earns his name in my book! It's not an easy thing to do, but every step we take towards loving and protecting animals is a score! (Thanks Tamra for the wonderful link!)

Peta agrees, "He's A Real Prince, siting his very words, "Compassion is an action word with no boundaries." Everyone could take a great lesson here. Thank you Prince! You really are "Revolutionary" ;)

Saved Memories: My Green Mazda

2010-07-02T03:11:00.002-03:00

As I was headed to work this morning, passing by all of the car dealerships, the memory of my favorite car flooded back to me. It was my 1994 Dark Green Mazda MX-6.

When I bought the car, I was not close to being in the market. I was out driving around as I could often be found, in the current car I was driving, a little older black Mazda 626 GT, with Sun Roof, Stereo, 5-speed stick shift and all. It was a great car, and the only thing that was wrong with it was my Muffler had fallen off, and I needed a new one.

For some odd reason, I got a wild hair up my ass that I needed to go car shopping. Usually, my Dad would go with me and make sure that I didn't get a bad deal, and co-sign, check everything out and all that. But this day I went out on my own, with head full of youth fever.

I drove all the way out to Covington Pike Mazda (close to where I work now), and set out across the lot to take a look around. Of course one of the evil sharks was quick to fly over to his new-found prey and got me hook, line and sinker. The guy talked a bit about the cars, we were looking at the program cars (which basically meant there were a few miles on the cars due to testing, or other use, but usually not bad).

Those cars went for a cheaper price. I remember like it was yesterday: $12,500. I almost got the baby blue one. It was pretty. Why I decided on the dark green I don't know, although I do love green.

Not the actual photo, but very similar to the one I owned
except mine did not have the spoiler. I loved that car. :)

When I arrived home, needless to say, my father was less than happy. I don't think it was really because I got the worst deal, but more that it was the first time I had ventured off and made a rash decision on my own without consulting him. For some reason I felt like he was going to be proud that I had made this command decision, but instead I guess I illustrated in some way that I had grown up a little more and needed him a little less.

Oddly I didn't give my little green Mazda a name, though it was so special to me. I'm rather inconsistent with naming my vehicles, I named my very first car "Paul" after Paul Stanley of KISS. After that I don't really remember naming any others, although I did name my motorcycle as everyone well knows, "Jimi" after Hendrix.

After all, his view was that there was nothing majorly wrong with my other car, just a muffler issue. That would've been an easy fix. Daddy could always fix anything, or knew someone who could take care of it, and he would always make sure that we didn't get a raw deal.

Although some of my most special memories were made in the green MX-6, cruising around with my friends, coming of age, listening to tunes, romantic moments (this was the car during my "Z" phase), and tons of outings with my partner in crime, Tamra. It turned out to be my favorite car. Still, I regretted doing it the way I did. Especially these days, oh what I wouldn't give to have my Dad alongside of me picking out cars once again. I miss him so much.

The car and I enjoyed each others kinship for nearly 3 good years before my nightmarish hydroplane off the interstate, hitting a tree and parting ways as it was totaled. That "totaling" marked not only the end of the car, but the end of a lot of things for me, and was the mile-marker for the start of a lot of harder times. About a month after the wreck, I did buy another car, my first real "NEW" one, and Dad had a hand in helping me with that one, but still not in the same way he used to.

That fateful day that I went off and made my own big girl buying decision, I guess I damaged a little part of my father's protective role in my life, one that upon looking back I dearly wish I could have saved.

Here is one of the first songs I remember cruising to in the car. Lenny Kravitz "Spinning" (from Reality Bites Soundtrack)

Saved Is The Word

2010-07-01T11:35:00.003-03:00

July seems like a good time for me to try my NaBloPoMo (daily posting). I mean, half of the year has passed and I figure it might be a cool month to try. The theme for July blogging is "Saved", and that's whatever you make out of it, things we save or hang on to, saving lives, savings at stores, limitless possibilities.

So yes, July is here, and the summer is in full swing of course and the thermostat in Memphis has been turned all the way up. It actually feels a little cooler today than it has in a while, but it has been a sweat fest. I'm just a fall/winter girl. Can't help it. Still, I can't believe that the year is half gone already... Yeah I know, time, shmime, right? What does it really mean? We are the ones who make ourselves a slave to the clock.

Ok, so I am going to leave this post as is. I will make another official first post for "Saved", just letting everyone know that I'm trying for every day in July. Wish me luck, and leave no extra negative thoughts. I have enough of my own ;)

Creepy Goes Commercial

2010-06-29T11:21:00.004-03:00

A few posts back I touched on creepy vintage ads in print. Now I simply must share these creepy commercials that I found in the depths of Marketing Hell.

Toy Commercial Fail

Good luck trying to go to sleep... ever again!

McCreepy McCommercial

No, he's no stranger, he's just a burger wielding psychotic clown who preys on young junk food eating innocents.

Taste My Niblets

Maybe they were trying to scare the kids into eating their veggies?

No creepy commercial post would be complete without...

Waking Up With A Heart Attack

The King Pole Dancing (was a close 2nd)

Any way you slice it, Burger King is Royally Creepy.

Freaky Frost Bites

It's nice to know that we haven't lost the creep factor in our modern commercials.

And for a final freak out attack...

Happy Meal

This is french, and I don't think it's an actual commercial but it will probably make you a vegetarian anyway haha!

Birthday Blast

2010-06-22T23:56:00.009-03:00

Yes, I think I will just claim 15 again, and stay there. Looking back, my teen years were worry free. I mean, there was the bi-weekly broken heart and all, but geez. It was a time when people said, "You've got your whole life ahead of you." and it was still true... wait, well it's still true, just now there is less of it ahead of me. That's all.

No, I actually didn't get a cake, or any kind of party... Didn't really care.

Basically, I just took off two extra days and treated myself to a 4 day weekend in honor of my birthday. Today, June 22nd is the actual date. However, my honorary "celebration" of it began when I got off work Friday night. We met up with some friends at the Midtown Sekisui, and then came home to watch a few more episodes of "Weeds", a tv series that many of you are probably familiar with, one that my 'ol' man' got me hooked on. Finally we have finished the series thanks to Netflix Streaming, and can await the 5th season coming in August.

I was adamant that I didn't want a huge deal made out of my birthday, and that's always a bit tricky. Ok. Saturday, slept late and relaxed some, then Richie's familia called us up and wanted to meet at our favorite mexican restaurant, "Guadalajara Grill", which Richie's mom affectionately refers to as "The Guadamala... that guadamalan... guadamalan grill." Ok, so she just can't say Guadalajara. Anyways, I put the chokehold on my antisocial birthday wishes, and we agree since everything on their menu is excellent.

Of course Richie outs me to the waiter, and the whole gang comes over and slaps the sombrero on me and sings a Mexican happy birthday song. Then they distract me by putting a cinnamon/honey covered goody with a whipped cream smiley face on it in front of me (even though I opted for no dessert), and then when I least expect it, slam a saucer of whipped cream into my face. I wasn't a happy camper about that, but I didn't get too pissed. I just jokingly acted like I was going to get the culprit and his band of merry pie-facers back when they least expected it. I am also going to get Richie and his brother back, just for good measure.

So I got the cool whip off my face, and we finished up dinner and Richie and I spent the evening to ourselves to enjoy romance or something like it, birthday and all y'know.

Sunday, I'm sorry to say that we chose to forfeit the Motorcycle Ride to Shiloh due to waking up late and the damn Memphis heat index... Just couldn't bear it, although I understand the guys that went had a good time. Maybe we can make the July ride... I hope so. :(

Then Sunday afternoon I convinced my Mother to (shockingly) come to MY house to spend the night with me... I begged it in honor of my birthday, and that I thought it would be fun. Monday morning we got up, and had oatmeal, raisin toast and coffee and enjoyed a nice morning to afternoon. Took her home and I got a few things done around the house. A closet that I have been needing to attend to has been successfully organized. That made me happy.

Monday and Tuesday were kind of free days for me since Richie had to work and I took off to relax and goof off. A little R&R, and it was well needed. He got me a punching bag for my birthday, so I could practice my punches and kicks. I appreciate that, I will try to make good use of it. Speaking of Kickboxing, although today was the big day, I went ahead and made it to my 6:30 class, which was a good workout.

There were 2 other birthday gifts though, my Mom gave me 20 bucks and a lovely card, and my best friend Tamra and her daughter Jess sent me a cute card & gave me a really cool bracelet, it had pearls all the way around, and then several little charms hanging, hearts & birds. Very sweet. I'll post pics of my birthday loot soon.

So that's really the birthday rundown. Not too much excitement to speak of, but that is the usual around here... never much to write home about these days.

However, thanks all for the lovely birthday notes and wishes! I'd also like to send a big shout-out to my lovely Sister, Vickie who sent me several scary psycho killer clowns on Facebook for my birthday. She knows just how much I despise clowns, the stinking creepy F****rs!!!

Almost forgot, I owe you all the story of my Blood Drive motorcycle escapades with my friend Glenda too... this was LAST Saturday. Let's see... where do I start? I will gather my thoughts and make this tomorrow's post. Sorry, I'm tired tonight... it's been a long 15th Birthday, takes a lot out of a gal.

Happy Father's Day

2010-06-20T17:01:00.003-03:00

Here's hoping that all of you Dads out there are having a great day. I sure miss mine, so enjoy every moment with your kids. Make it a special one. I'm just going to leave it at that today.... oh, and with these.

Ruth E. Renkel

Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance.

Bartrand Hubbard

I've had a hard life, but my hardships are nothing against the hardships that my father went through in order to get me to where I started.

Anonymous
4 years: My Daddy can do anything!
7 years: My Dad knows a lot…a whole lot.
8 years: My father does not know quite everything.
12 years: Oh well, naturally Father does not know that either.
14 years: Oh, Father? He is hopelessly old-fashioned.
21 years: Oh, that man-he is out of date!
25 years: He knows a little bit about it, but not much.
30 years: I must find out what Dad thinks about it.
35 years: Before we decide, we will get Dad's idea first.
50 years: What would Dad have thought about that?
60 years: My Dad knew literally everything!
65 years: I wish I could talk it over with Dad once more.

It's Not The Heat

2010-06-19T12:43:00.002-03:00

It's the humidity... right? That's what people always say around here. But they're lying. It is both. Memphis is a sweaty sauna. Maybe it's not the hottest city temp-wise, but I think we have a shot at first in humidity... and mosquitoes.

This week felt long, and I am glad that the weekend is here. It's Father's Day weekend, and a few other things, but I will be doing a special post for Father's Day and all that. The holidays are still tender without Dad's physical presence... still hard for my Mom. So I intend to spend time with her for Father's day. Don't knock it, don't judge it.

So, I think we are biking to Shiloh Sunday with our group, I know it's going to be hot, but I think it will be fun. I'm looking forward to it anyway. Little bit of Civil War reinactment, shooting off some cannons or somethin... Gonna take my camera. I know that it's going to be really hot, but other people have been riding around in this heat. It'll be fine.

The rest of the weekend, who knows. I'm supposed to do "Chola" makeup and post it on Facebook for Div, so maybe I'll have time to do that today sometime. People seem to get weirded out when I do odd make-up jobs just for the sake of taking photos, but I don't care. And it doesn't mean I have too much time on my hands, I barely have time to do it, I just make some time usually on a lazy day or late in the night.

Just trying to stay cool, and keep everyone straightened out and trying my best to enjoy a little time not being bothered.

Hope everyone's well... Here's a little heat humor.

Little Boxes

2010-06-17T20:54:00.003-03:00

This song about sums up today's feelings... just click play :)

Lots To Talk About, Nothing Much To Say

2010-06-16T00:15:00.006-03:00

Even when I ramble on, I guess it's just a bunch of "Malarkey" as my Dad always called it.

So many zany and interesting thoughts pass through my skull on a daily basis, and I forget to write all of them down.

Maybe I should start to carry that little digital recorder around with me everywhere so I can capture each and every little and genius and amazing notion. But now I will just ramble a bit and see what comes.

My kickboxing class fell through today since the teacher wasn't feeling that well and the other ladies in class had things going on. I was the only one who showed up today, and since it seems like we all had a rough go starting the week, I bowed out and gave Mrs. F an R&R day. I figured I could use the extra day to recharge my batteries too. I think we'll all feel a little better Friday, and maybe everyone will be there.

So I went back home, and Richie (who is slightly ailing from an Arm Bar by his instructor), and I went to our favorite little Mexican place for some supper. We exchanged a few funny little jokes with our waiter, who has become more of a good friend by now I suppose. He happened to mention that the news had been showing some of the happenings "on this day" in history. One of note was the 1994 OJ Simpson murder incident / car chase (one of the slowest car chases in history).

The actual slow car chase happened on June 17th when OJ failed to turn himself in.

As I eyed the footage, I was reminded of how funny it was watching the police on the news just trail behind OJ as he puttered around in his white bronco. What a time, that was just... so weird looking back.

My best friend Tamra and friend at the time Sherry laughed and made jokes for the longest time, every time they would see a white bronco out and about. "Oh my god, there goes OJ!!!" I remember that well.

All this "Malarkey" got me looking up a few other important moments from today in history:

1890 Stan Laurel comedy team Laurel and Hardy was born in Lancashire, England.
1903 Ford Motors incorporates
1903 Pepsi Cola company forms
1960 "Psycho," opens in NY
1967 Monterrey International Pop Festival Opened
1974 Homer Simpson & Marge Bouvier wed
1989 "Ghostbusters II" premieres
1990 "U Can't Touch This" by MC Hammer peaks at #8
1996 96th U.S. Golf Open: Steve Jones shoots a 278 wins at Oakland Hills CC

Ehh, I dunno. Something's always going on of course... We can always look back in awe or laugh at the funny and strange things that have happened throughout our world's history, but it does us positively no good for the present.

I personally feel that there is nothing at all wrong with missing the past, thinking about what might have been or having hope for the future. That's only human, and after all we're here to learn all we can about how to do that. The important thing is to keep moving, and never get too lost in the past or the future.

The present, that's really all we've got. What the world needs now, is more "NOW". If we could all learn to just BE and become more accepting of all that is, then the peace and love would just come naturally. Yes, open up and live in the NOW. After all, "THIS-- this was what made life: a moment of quiet, the water falling in the fountain, the girl's voice... a moment of captured beauty. He who is truly wise will never permit such moments to escape." (Louis L'Amour)

Now, as I never like to take too much seriousness in anything along with the fact that I couldn't find a decent motivational poster to sum up my entire jug of philosophical word vomit (above), I decided to leave you with this guy. ;) Have a good'n y'all.

Vintage Mania Monday

2010-06-14T18:17:00.002-03:00

It's Monday, that sucks and we deserve a little laugh. I have recently found a number of creepy, whacked out and just plain 'wrong' old Vintage ads, and I give you a peek at these of course including my commentary. Enjoy the slideshow!

If you have trouble viewing the slideshow or reading the captions, Click Here To View Photos.

Sky Remains The Same As Ever

2010-06-08T16:38:00.005-03:00

Oh terrible me, I see that I haven't written since the 1st. I can moan about being busy, but it won't help matters at all. I can moan about being stressed but it will only waste my valuable energy!! :)

So let's see, what's been shakin?

Still doing the Kickboxing class and I really am enjoying it. Whether I get good at it or not, at least it's something I always thought about trying, and did and I'm getting a pretty good workout to boot. Of course I listen to my music as I always do throughout the course of the day, and I get stuck on certain songs... sometimes I think when you hear a particular song over and over again, on repeat in your head, and just can't seem to get rid of it, that there is a message in there somewhere.

For me, the last few days I have been stuck on Audioslave - Doesn't Remind Me Of Anything, which is an o.k. song, but I just don't get it. I haven't heard it lately, unless I just didn't pay attention so I don't know why it is stuck in my head. Check it out.

Monday night, we went to the Hi Tone to see Mono (from Japan). They are basically alot of Ambient music, some heavy parts, but really more sound and emotion... they were quite amazing to see live. Check them out if you like.

So needless to say, I got to sleep way too late at night on Monday (honestly near 4:00 a.m.) and had to be a trooper and still hit the grind stone. But I prevailed, which gave me a little confidence boost and made me think I still had it, I could still stay out all night and make it to work. ha-ha.

I have had a lot of thoughts on the brain and I want to share, but I'm sweaty from Kickboxing and want to take a soak and go to bed on time tonight. Oh yeah, so let me share this before I leave... It's from the Daily OM. I dig it.

June 9, 2010

The Greatness in Others
Recognizing Our Own Greatness

We cannot recognize greatness in others unless we too posses that same quality in ourselves.

A person who is said to possess greatness stands apart from others in some way, usually by the size or originality of their vision and their ability to manifest that vision. And yet those who recognize that greatness, whether they display it themselves or not, also have greatness within them; otherwise, they could not see it in another. In many ways, the achievements of one person always belong to many people for we accomplish nothing alone in this world. People who display greatness rely upon others who are able to see as they do, to listen, encourage, and support. Without those people who recognize greatness and move in to support it, even the greatest ideas, works of art, and political movements would remain unborn.

We are all moved by greatness when we see it, and although the experience is to some degree subjective, we know the feeling of it. When we encounter it, it is as if something in us stirs, awakens, and comes forth to meet what was inside us all along. When we respond to someone else’s greatness, we feed our own. We may feel called to dedicate ourselves to their vision, or we may be inspired to follow a path we forge ourselves. Either way, we cannot lose when we recognize that the greatness we see in others belongs also to us. Our recognition of this is a call to action that, if heeded, will inspire others to see in us the greatness they also possess. This creates a chain reaction of greatness unfolding itself endlessly into the future.

Ultimately, greatness is simply the best of what humanity has to offer. Greatness does what has not been done before and inspires the same courage that it requires. When we see it in others, we know it, and when we trust its presence in ourselves, we embody it.

Today's DailyOM brought to you by:
http://www.dailyom.com/cgi-bin/display/adspolink.cgi?iid=160&aid=7252

Happy Birthday Mr. Awesome

2010-06-01T12:54:00.003-03:00

Today is my amazing husband, Richie's birthday! I just wanted to dedicate this post to him, and wish him a wonderful day. He puts a smile on my face when I am tired, and keeps me going forward. I'm grateful, and very blessed to have him in my life. Happy Birthday my love, my best friend and enjoy this and all of your days.

That being said, below is a funny Face In Hole video of him breaking bricks and looking awesome. For him, that's not hard. Richie, you rock... always! -Love, Jackie

Click Here To See Richie Break Bricks!!

Cheesy, I know- lol!

Just Not Forever (Poem For Daddy)

2010-05-26T22:59:00.006-03:00

Warning: I was feeling quite melancholy tonight, I wrote this poem for my Daddy. Oh, I did it to myself. That's one of my gifts, heavy emotion, making myself all sad... but it's o.k., I don't mind. I would rather feel, and go through pain, and come out the other side shining than never to have loved, or felt, or been so loved at all. If you knew my family, and my friends you would sure know how lucky I am.

That being said, and if you have dared to go this far, then read on.

"Just Not Forever"
(For Daddy - 8/29/27 - 1/14/09)

I know what they say is true
How things appear to be
but all I really want
is for you to come home
sit across the table
have a cup of coffee
we'll share a laugh or two
maybe we'll even argue
but you'll be there
and things will be
right again
This world is really messed up
without you here
to talk to,
to tell my jokes to
and to laugh with
oh, without your shoulder
to cry on when I'm sad
when things go sliding
from good down to bad,
or reversed, yeah.
Even though I know
I can still talk to you
they tell me you can hear
but I don't hear you,
not like I want
so I can't just
lean on you now
because you're not here
to listen, laugh or
tell me that
everything will be o.k.
You always said it would;
but it's hard sometimes
to believe it
though I never doubted it
No, I never doubted you
not even for a second.
You and Mama have
always been
the only real thing
that's right with
the world
and these days,
these dark and lonely days
nothing feels right
and I know she cries-
yeah, I know it brings you pain
but what can I do?
I feel so helpless
I feel alone too.
She keeps trying, I guess
wakes up one more day...
She deserved all of
them to be good days,
but now we're all just
sitting here
with holes in our hearts
where you used to
sit across the table
have a cup of coffee
share a laugh or two
sometimes even argue
but you were there
and things were right
then, yes they were,
just not forever
like we dreamt,
like we dreamt,
not like we dreamt at all.

That one is for Mom and Dad... The ultimate teachers on how to love, how to live and what a family should feel like.

Daddy we can't help it, but we miss you so much, and I just had to write this out tonight...

Please keep on watching over all of us and send a little strength our way, we really need it.

I know that your warm smile is part of the sky's light that shows our way, and that we'll all be together again one of these days.

That's my Mama and my Daddy... my heroes.

Needle And The Damage Done

2010-05-25T23:13:00.004-03:00

Jewel was on Howard Stern's Show (on Sirius) this week and she sang the following song, The Needle And The Damage Done (Neil Young). It was pretty haunting, sad and I've had it stuck in my head ever since.

So I take a moment to think about all of the people who have loved, and lost anybody they loved to a horrible addiction or disease.

No matter when, why or how, it hurts just the same, and leaves a hole in our hearts forever. Even though we know that they're safe, loved and still living on in our hearts and right by our side, watching and hearing every word, and every tear, we miss them terribly.

Here's to needed hope for the ones not yet too far gone.

Sending out healing, love and strength to everyone... Love, Aunt Jackie

Sunday Burn

2010-05-23T09:30:00.007-03:00

Geezuz it was hotter than High Noon in Death Valley today!

Still trying to get things finished up for my contributions to Meggy's FABA (For Artists By Artists) event this weekend. With my procrastinating nature, and lack of time I am struggling but I will prevail, miraculously at the last moments. :)

The weekend passed off way too fast. I did get some motorcycle riding in, and visited my Mom. We watched a few movies, to include "The Slammin Salmon" (a comedy, I recommend it, pretty funny). Then for our Sunday supper, we made Vegetable Chili with Mexican Cornbread (it was a Mr. J and AJ combined effort, Kudos to Mr. J on doing the Chili!). Nice when you can work together and enjoy doing things.

A busy week coming up, so hopefully I'll get through unscathed.

As far as updates or any new interesting events, I don't have anything to report right this moment, but I am working and things are all a-brew... Will of course blog anytime something exciting happens and as my friend Kim says, "You never know what a day might bring." It's true, and we have to put a little effort on our own part for opportunity and to get things done, because it's not just going to fall into our laps, we have to work towards our goals, and take advantage of the things we have and chances we're given. Where that came from, I don't know... I just blab what comes into my silly head. Don't shoot the messenger.

Ok, well that about wraps up my loco Sunday update, I just thought I would pop in and babble for a few and I have done that.

I'll now leave you with an interesting photo to ponder...

Stupidity?? Or Genius?

(I vote stupidity for the person who's car it is and genius for the one who comes along and locks the brainiac inside it Muuhaha!)

Question Time with AJ.

Q: If you were to publish a book about yourself, what will you title it?
A. That's a toughy... "Barefoot In The Grass" or maybe "Valleys and Peaks", I dunno... I do want to write one sometime though. I'm going to.

If you would like to "Ask AJ Anything", then either e-mail her at auntiejac@gmail.com

or hit me up at http://www.formspring.me/jcquewood.

Have a great week!

Friday, My B.F.F. & Shootout

2010-05-21T15:54:00.014-03:00

This morning when I Facebooked about Friday in my status message about 'Friday being in the house', one of my favorite blog pals, Angie (No More Empty Fortune Cookies) said that Friday was her B.F.F., and it got me to thinking, ME TOO!! For those of us who are corporate 'slaves to the man', workin the 8 or 9 - 5 all week long, Friday feels that way. No better day of the week (well, once you actually get off work that is). This is the time that all of you independent people, who've broken away from the time clock can insert a gloating remark such as "Friday means nothing to me, I am on my own schedule." Well, good for you. Revel in the fact that we're all jealous of you.

Also, I realize that there are others who are not as fortunate as us MF'rs (Monday - Friday'ers, what were YOU thinking?!). Yes we too can feel as though others only aspire to our cubicle-hell greatness... these would be restaurant workers, retail workers, truckers or just any other profession that doesn't end at 5 O'Clock Friday. We understand, and feel your pain. Hey, I've been there too.

My proclamation is, of course that I would like to eventually sustain myself financially with the skills and talents that I really love, which would be my artistic and creative endeavors. I'm working on that... I'm gonna get it all together, I've been feeling urged to get moving. After all, there's no special season to apply yourself and improve your life, you're the only one who can make those changes and do something with yourself. No excuse in the world merits saying, "Oh, I am going to but have to wait until {fill in the blank}"... nothing! So I am about to go global... I'll keep you posted ;)

Till then Friday is still Angie's B.F.F. and mine and probably yours too.

Also, please see Help Rebuild Nashville link from Angie's page.

Nashville Will Thank you!

I thought about tweeting the following news item, but since my blog is hooked up in such a way that it 'auto-tweets' my posts-Geez, social networking has taken over my life hasn't it? wtf! I don't have to worry.

This tidbit was shared with me by my V.B.B.F.F. (Very Best Best Friend Forever, had to make that distinction so Friday would understand), Tamra. If you've been reading me for a while, you should be familiar with Tamra, she's my blond bombshell partner in crime.

Anyroad, it appears that Yesterday(West Memphis, AR 5/20/2010) there was this big Shootout in West Memphis that killed two police officers and wounded two more. At this point they did not know all of the details, or were not sharing certain details, but the article linked above was able to provide more today.

Here are a few of the details:

Initial police broadcasts identified the van the two men responsible were traveling in as belonging to a church in southern Ohio. The news 'On Your Side' investigators learned the church had a controversial history including ties to white supremacy. (Well, there you go... two negative marks against them already.)

That white minivan now sits rammed and riddled with bullets.The two men inside were shot and killed during a gun battle with police. (Good news, eh?)

Today's new details reveal that the two people in the white van have been identified as Jerry Kane, 45, of Ohio and his 16-year-old son, Joseph. (Good Job Dad!!! You're another reason that I promote sterilization to stupid people so you don't breed and make useless carbon copies of those like yourself.)

Like I said, you can read it all at the link above, but it's just another impressive waste of human flesh causing otherwise innocent bystanders and their families unwanted tragedy. Don't you just get sick of idiots and all the bad news? It's just sad... If these people were the "True Christians" that they claim to be, and were really following the supposed examples of "Love, Peace and Understanding" of their brethren, they would do us all a favor and just turn the guns on themselves before leaving the house to 'do their Christian duty'. Then they could just stamp out the stupidity and be done for the day.

Now I don't want to spend the rest of my Friday in a bad mood, so I must try and reverse the negativity of something senseless and horrible like that. Hmmm, how could this be accomplished?? It's gonna take something really strong, really big... I know!! MIDGETS! Not just any midgets, this is gonna require Midgets dressed up like the band KISS, singing "Rock and Roll All Night". Yes, an all-midget KISS Tribute band called "Mini Kiss". You can thank me later.

Mini Kiss singing on Jimmy Kimmel Rock It Boys!

If you'll notice at the end, Kimmel thanks his guests, and one of them is John Stamos, who is (as reported by Howard Stern) deathly afraid of Midgets. With that knowledge, I had to laugh. I bet the Kiss Midgets scared the crap out of him.

Until next time, this is AJ wishing you a Rockin Little Weekend!

Ten Ten Ten

2010-05-19T13:10:00.004-03:00

Well would you look at that, I made a mid-week post! I'm doing a little better. I'm still staying quite the busy bee, and trying to better organize myself in other areas, work, personal, creative, and I have a lot of things coming my way and things I want to accomplish! So just sharing.

The last couple days, I've been working on a few of these "lists of 10", no meme or anything, just something I jotted down as a post idea, and finally decided to throw it in. Why 10? Just because really... I just felt like 10. It could make for a bit more "AJ Enlightenment" for ya. So how about we start with...

My 10 favorite works of art.

Now, just a note that I made this a list of 10, but I have so many favorite works of art, I just narrowed it down for the sake of this shorter list. Each one I love for a different reason. Don't feel like explaining why now, just know it's a reflection of something in my soul.

"Gala Contemplating the Mediterranean Sea which at Twenty Metres Becomes the Portrait of Abraham Lincoln" 1976 by Salvador Dali View
"Nighthawks" 1942 by Edward Hopper View
"The Old Guitarist" 1903 by Pablo Picasso View
"The Walk, Woman with a Parasol" 1875 by Claude Monet View
"The Thinker" Bronze, 1902 by Auguste Rodin View
"Luncheon of the Boating Party" 1881 by Pierre Auguste Renoir View
"Kiss V" 1964 by Roy Lichtenstein View
"Le Rêve" 1932 by Pablo Picasso View
"Jane Avril" (Poster) 1893 by Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec View
"Migrant Mother" 1936 by Dorthea Lange View

10 unforgettable moments in my life:

Daddy taking me shopping for a bean bag when I was really small

Being potty trained (yes I vaguely remember this)

Eating Honeysuckle and catching fireflies as a child

The Deaths of all of my animal loved ones

Learning to drive

The death of my sister's youngest daughter (just 20), it changed us all forever

My first Kiss

Losing my heart to Z

Finding my heart again when falling for my husband

The Death of my Father

Write a 10 line poem. (Really? Am I that quick?)
Ok, let's wing it:
"On the wings of the wind I hear your song
keeping me peaceful at night, and all along
on the lips of the wind I hear your voice
whispering why you left, that you'd made your choice
I feel the fingers of the wind brush the hair from my face
You know I always hated it to be out of place
In the eyes of the sun, I see your smile
Brightening our paths to go another mile
Then in the shadow of dreams I hold my pillow to me
and hear you whisper "All in time, one day you too will be free..."

and finally...
My 10 favorite sounds:

My husband's laughter
Thunderstorms / Rain
My favorite music
Voices of my Loved Ones
All the frogs at night
Crickets too (evening sounds)
Songs of Birds
Wind in the trees
Noises horses make
Complete Silence

I don't wanna ruin this stuff with too many more words, but I hope you enjoyed my little self-meme list of tens... Just something to do, and I enjoy lists.

Hope you're all doing well, and I'll pop in when I can. If you leave me a comment and say hello, I would appreciate it and you would help me remember who to pop in and visit. It's so hard to keep up with everyone. If you're reading this, leave a note even if you're anonymous. Just to let me know you were here. Love to you! -AJ (a.k.a. Jaxxx, a.k.a. Jackie)

Tenacious Dio (R.I.P)

2010-05-16T22:18:00.006-03:00

After Mother's Day, the week really slid by me. Workload for me has not let up very much, but Friday wasn't too bad. I just still didn't get any chance to post. Now the weekend has been a little different story. Laziness was all that prevented my posting. Despite the storms around the areas, and the flooding in Millington, and of course Nashville the rain has been persistent off and on through the week, and it's back again this afternoon. More thunder, lightening and all of that.

Not that I mind as long as it isn't flooding or more damage for the people who've already suffered issues because of it. If anyone was wondering (since I did get a few emails and so forth asking if we were o.k. here), there were flooded parts of our area, but nothing like Nashville, or the area above Memphis, Millington. So far so good here. Anyways, that's about it on the rain front.

I know my blog time has been severely less lately, and my posts have not been much which I don't like because I do enjoy blogging and intend to keep going. I just haven't had enough time to think of anything good and time to post it...

Hopefully I'll do better in the days to come.

Now then, what prompted me to blog is about another Celebrity death, Ronnie James Dio, Heavy Metal god in his own right and also once lead singer of Black Sabbath after Ozzy. I've never been the hugest fan of Dio's vocals, but he is extremely revered in the Metal Community. I respect him for his legend and his music itself even though I wasn't that much into it. So evidently, Dio had been battling Stomach Cancer for a while, and lost the battle.

Well, another sad moment in Rock, and the hearts of his millions of fans. I know he is out there in the Cosmos throwing us all his infamous "Goat Sign" and would if he could tell us that everything is gonna be alright.

Rock on Dio, and I know you will. Read Full Article On Dio's Death

Here's a little tribute to Dio, if you have ever seen "Tenacious D" (Jack Black & Kyle Gass) you'll know what these are about. If not, you should look them up and check out "Tenacious D" for sure... it's been around a while, but they're hilarious.

I give you Tenacious D playing "Heaven & Hell"

And Tenacious D singing their own "Dio"

R.I.P.D = Rock In Peace Dio!

Always An Angel

2010-05-09T12:34:00.012-03:00

My mother is a poem
I'll never be able to write,
though everything I write
is a poem to my mother.
~Sharon Doubiago

Sometimes I have trouble finding my muse... then I think of Mama, and I am miraculously able to move forward. Sometimes I feel down on my luck, or wonder how to go on... and then I think of what my Mom has endured in her own life, and all of the gifts I have because of her and I feel stupid not to put one more foot forward. Mom is an endless inspiration to me, an endless song of love. She's been the greatest teacher, the best friend, the warmest heart and the most comfort in times when she probably felt low on those things herself. There is nothing I hold higher than that precious soul on Earth that I call "Mom".

Although I feel that I have let her down many times in my life, and that I can never repay her fully for everything she has given to me, I try. I do the best I can, which I always feel pales in comparison to her. My guilt sometimes asphyxiates me and I don't know what to do. I wish I could spend every hour, every day and every moment helping her and loving her as she has me. I must resolve myself to the fact that I can't reach the heights that I want to, the heights that SHE deserves.

So I can only offer this, my undying love and devotion and the promise to her that no matter where I am, even if I am unable to be by her side at that given moment that my life, my heart and all of my love are a song, dedicated to her, one which would never have been played or sung if it were not for her existence, her decision to be here and give me her creation.

This woman, living proof of angels, who has endured so much, who has given all of herself to sustain and protect her children, and asked so very little in return, deserves the universe. My prayer is only that she realizes that it is already hers and that she is loved far, far more than she could ever be told with any words, by us all.

So, Mom, I Love You With Every Part Of My Soul. You are never far from thought and always close to heart. Your life has been a lesson in love; Because all of the love you share and the caring things you do, have taught us to reach out and help, to fix what is broken.

With love alone you have changed my life and for that I'm truly grateful. Happy Mothers Day!

Leaning On Reality

2010-05-07T10:59:00.015-03:00

Stand by for what you might deduce as psychotic ramblings by AJ ;)

Reality is a funny thing. That needn't be some hugely astounding, Nobel-prize winning statement of the century, it's just a string of characters, a few short words. What are words anyway if not all-too-commonly misused gifts of our language?

Photo caption: "Reality is merely an illusion,
albeit a very persistent one." ~Einstein

Just throw your Ego out the window for a moment and examine the phrase. "Reality is a funny thing." (Now I'm not talking about Reality Television, which is indeed its own animal, and not much of one at that-can you taste my disdain?)

Oh yes, this might leave you thinking, "Oh how can you say that? Reality is very serious indeed. Reality is dire to our existence and everyone needs to wake up and smell the coffee! We all need to be slapped in the face by this Reality, people need to grow up and learn the seriousness of how things really are in this life!!"

Oh, come on... relax a little!

Wikipedia says that 'Reality is the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or may be thought to be.' I'm inclined to disagree since they used the word "actually", indicating that there is one solid truth to be found.

Well, I'll be the first one to tell you (and maybe one of the few human beings to admit) that I, Aunt Jackie, do not know everything. However, I am quite confident of one thing, "REALITY" is relative to the one perceiving it. There is no set rules of truth. In fact, it's extremely unlikely for any two souls to see this in the same way.

So all the teaching, preaching and fighting in the world isn't going to solve anything, and to force someone to share your beliefs, or to push your 'medicine' on another living creature is just not right. Feel free to crucify me if you'd like, but the truth is that we are all brought up by people with personalities and beliefs as vast as the universe itself, and its up to us to find our own personal truths. Someone once said, "Physical reality springs from the imagination, which follows the path of your beliefs." Believe what you will, which you will though... I am not a preacher who commands myself be followed! :)

Life is what you make it, I believe that. Depending on the paths that we take and the lessons that we learn in our own individual experiences, Reality can change quite frequently. As long as we are open to learning, and growing as souls and human beings (which we all should be, but not everyone is), then what we once held to be true in life can suddenly be a whole different ball game.

Think about it, even on a linear scale, which might be more comfortable for you: You were single, you met the 'love of your life' and got married. Your life changes. You were one person, you had a child. Reality as you know it is transformed and your life changes completely! You lose a loved one and your world is never the same again. Ok, even on a smaller scale-you lose a tooth... every cellular change counts. Sometimes you might not even notice.

Maybe you think I'm nuts, in fact I hope you do. I'll take that as a compliment! Besides, we should ALL frequently tell ourselves that we will only react to constructive suggestions, as it would provide some protection against our own negative thoughts and those of others. I'm a work in progress, as we all are.

So is "Reality".

"I leaned against reality and it gave." ~Jane Roberts

Remember "The Big Lebowski"? Well, a cool blog pal of mine, and great writer, Nothingman popped by one day to inform me that a post I had called "Mark It Zero" still pulled up top image results when that phrase was searched in Google. Ha-ha isn't that interesting the way search results work sometimes.

Read Mark It Zero (if you feel like it).

The Big Lebowski is one of my favorite movies of all times, basically because it is funny as hell, and just great. I don't know what it is about the movie. It's usually one of those "guy favorites", but I tend to like most silly comedies and other things guys like, video games, goofy humor and all. A lot of people might think that is 'stupid' or 'immature', but it doesn't make any difference to me. There's enough propaganda and overly-serious crap running around out there. Too many murders and disasters on the news, I don't need to watch movies about that, and what people believe is going to happen in this universe. As I have indicated above, I will decide what I believe on all that myself.

In other words, don't offer me any of your B.S., I already have a plate full on my own. When I receive these paranoid, scare-tactics in chain mail and all of the heinous things that are going around out there for the thousandth time, I usually roll my eyes and hit the delete button. Whenever you send me negative thoughts, or extraneous things that are "junk" in my mind they get marked as such, or once again I 'roll my eyes and hit delete'.

I don't have time to battle extra negativity. I have a hard enough time just existing, just being Me. If you don't like what I have to say, then by all means, feel free to Mark It Zero! :)

Of Long Ago

2010-04-28T22:47:00.008-03:00

Back in the day, way back in the days before television and cool gadgetry, families gathered together after a long, hard day and were transported to the only world of entertainment they had, the radio.

Off and on I find myself indulging in these classics, and imagining what it must have been like when women still took great pride in their appearances, and went to so much trouble to stay lady-like and feminine. They wore pristine suits and gloves and hats, and the men did too. I'm not saying there weren't hard working people in tattered garments and worn jeans and all that, but not in public. Those clothes were for working, and for working in the fields and getting dirty.

If you were showing your face in public you were presentable and elegant. You got 'dressed for dinner', everyone sat down at the table, in the dining room and had dinner as a family. Yes certainly there were exceptions to this, but I think it's the way I romanticize the era when I listen to the songs, and these radio classics.

Why am I drawn to this? I listen in and almost imagine myself there, maybe as a sassy stenographer living in New York City like "My Friend Irma", Walking the city streets in my fancy little dress suit, perfectly styled. Maybe I have on shiny, pointy-toed pumps and can actually walk in them. If I were like Irma, I might have some suave, city-slicker boyfriend who takes me to dinner... Chivalry isn't yet dead. :)

I've often fantasized about running a cool little Italian Pizzeria where the waiters and waitresses would present themselves with style. I fancied maybe playing nothing but the old Italian singers like Perry Como, Dean Martin, Louis Prima, Frank Sinatra... on some beautifully restored jukebox from the past. Those singers are a mix of eras of course, but they still remind me of the mystery of a time gone by that I wasn't a part of.

These things make me feel as though there was once romance, neatness, lower crime rates, ladies, gentlemen and simplicity.

Here's a video link to an episode of "My Friend Irma"

It offers the next segments once you've listened to the first... give it a try, it's cool!

And here is one of my favorite songs from back in the day. One you might hear if you ever come out to "Jaxxx's Pizzeria". Play and Enjoy!

Lordy Lordy, Look Who's 40!

2010-04-22T08:00:00.006-03:00

Earth Day Turns 40 Today! Can you believe that? The article mentions that Earth Day, although now global all began with a bunch of 20-somethings working in an office over a diner. At first the name didn't sit well with them, they thought it sounded too much like an event for farmers, but it grew on them, as Earth Day itself has grown on all of us.

I try to think of the Earth every day, and although I am by far not its most talented helper, I try to reduce damage and increase awareness when I can. Sure I know I should do more, we all should think of helping the planet we live on and more than just this one day a year. However, today at least do something wonderful for the planet in honor even if it is to stop littering, or if you can plant something maybe a tree. Every bit counts. Don't ever think you don't make a difference just because you are only one person. It all adds up.

Here are a few Earth Day Links to check out.

Earth Day Network

Ecological Footprint Quiz (what's your impact?)

Earth Day Crafts and Activities

Earth Day Events

Earth Day Quotes:

"There are no passengers on Spaceship Earth. We are all crew." ~Marshall McLuhan, 1964

"Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste the sky as well as the earth." ~Henry David Thoreau <-that one's a little funny eh?

"Take nothing but pictures.
Leave nothing but footprints.
Kill nothing but time."
~Motto of the Baltimore Grotto, a caving society

"There is hope if people will begin to awaken that spiritual part of themselves, that heartfelt knowledge that we are caretakers of this planet." ~Brooke Medicine Eagle

"You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet." ~Hal Borland, Sundial of the Seasons, 1964

"Only when the last tree has died and the last river been poisoned and the last fish been caught will we realize we cannot eat money." ~Cree Indian Proverb

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtfully committed citizens can change the world.
Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." ~Margaret Mead

"I really wonder what gives us the right to wreck this poor planet of ours." ~Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

"What is the use of a house if you haven't got a tolerable planet to put it on?" ~Henry David Thoreau

And finally I know many people are of the opinion that Earth Day is just a humorless event meant to make people feel bad about drinking bottled water and beating up seals, but over the years many late night comedians and sitcom writers have found funny ways to promote green living and make us laugh at the same time. So, Here Is A Video To Make You Laugh!!

After all we must find the humor in everything, else it just won't work.

Here's a big hug to the Earth and all of you from Me!! Love, AJ

The Curious Case of Activia

2010-04-21T15:25:00.007-03:00

Sometimes you can't help but laugh aloud at certain things. It might be something that isn't a very big deal, or something that the next to come along doesn't see a drop of humor in, but still, there you are giggling. We all have different senses of humor... some dry, some sarcastic, some just silly.

This occurred to me today as I stepped into the Ladies' Restroom at work, and peered over into the waste basket only to see an empty "Activia" Yogurt container. First of all, Activia is well advertised due to its fiber and digestive system regulating functionality. The esteemed spokesperson for this bowel-balancing mojo is none other than Tony Curtis's daughter, Jamie Lee Curtis.

Maybe she had been in there? Ahh I think not.

Still, it wasn't too long ago that I watched the extremely hilarious stand-up by Wanda Sykes. She's just one of the funniest female comediennes out there in my humble opinion. Anyroad, Wanda was on a discussion about getting older, and things that made her feel old. So she mentions how she's watching T.V. and Sally Field, a.k.a. "The Flying Nun" is taking Boniva for brittle bones, and went on to say, "... and you mean to tell me that Jamie Curtis needs a yogurt to shit?!?" The way she put it just had me in stitches.

So all this came flooding back (no pun intended) when I saw that yogurt container in the trash. Besides, why is someone sitting in the toilet eating? That's just gross. Plus, I think it takes at least a couple of weeks for that stuff to get you going, so if you're looking for a quick fix, you're gonna be sitting there for a while, and I for one don't appreciate you tying up the john for that long. Take it home sista.

Ok, so that leads me up to my other topic du jour, a few things that really bug me. I've done this before, and although many things that annoy me stay the same, there's always a new creepy crawly or two sliding up under my skin.

Here we go:

This first one has to do with drivers (yes again). I consider myself fairly cordial to the others, unless they deserve being treated like a shithole. So when I allow someone over, or try to help someone out, I figure I might get returns on my investment, but usually no. Like this morning, I was waiting to get over and the person in the other lane just hovers there slightly beside/behind me. That really pisses me off. They know I am trying to get over, yet they can't speed up enough, or slow down enough for me to make the turn. Go to Hell ye callous bastards.

Next up is the work environment again. In crowded offices where everyone is packaged in their small-sized cubicles, and open to all noise, I feel it is just extremely rude and thoughtless of those who are passing by work areas laughing and chatting loudly as if they are outside or at some sporting event. They get directly behind me when talking on cell phones (just because there's a space there) as if I am invisible or don't exist and can't hear their conversations, and they have conference calls and loud meetings all hours of the day. They really just need to think of the others in the building who are trying to concentrate, and also may be on the phone with clients and such. It's not a private space, and we all have a job to do. Just a little common courtesy and an inside voice is all I am asking for. I would think at least the Managerial staff would be mindful of this, but they are just as bad or worse.

Ok this one is a repeat, so I will make it short. Waiters and Waitresses, again with the unruly devil children!!? I asked to be seated someplace quiet and less crowded. Don't honor that request only to sit a party of 20 (half of that screaming brats) right next to me 10 minutes later. Is this some sadistic joke? Furthermore, why is it that parents always have to take their kids out screaming it up at nice quiet restaurants anyway? Take them to McDonald's and lock them outside on the play equipment. Nobody and I mean NOBODY wants to hear these undisciplined little shits.

Finally, I must complain about "Mr. Nosy", a recent neighbor who has made his existence, presence and nosiness well known in the last few weeks. The man has lived across the street on the other corner from me since we've lived there (he stated that he has lived there 13 years). Still I just met him a few weeks ago. I don't know why, but getting 'thick' with my neighbors or many others than my family and close friends just doesn't appeal to me. I don't like having to get stuck in conversations or situations where you are faced with any sort of invitation for issues, and I just love my privacy. So when Mr. Nosy cranked up, I got a little anxious. I was as nice as I could be, but I have to admit that I find it deeply unsettling that he is always out on his curb, drinking coffee, hanging out, and watching the entire neighborhood. He asks nosy questions, and always catches you on your way here or there. On one hand it might be good to have an upstanding neighbor watching out in case other creeps come around up to no good, but then again, just how upstanding is the guy? I don't know him, and there are a lot of child molesters and weirdos in our little spot on the map. He may just fit that bill.

Ok, that's all for me right now, I have more to do and plenty of catching up with you guys to do too. I'll be around to read up on you shortly. Miss me?? I hope so.

Love, AJ

Everything Dies

2010-04-19T18:01:00.001-03:00

Or does it?

As usual, I am a little late discussing the latest news. By the time you get to me, you've read it over and over again.

Pete Steele, lead singer of "Type O Negative" died on 4-14. This depressed me a bit since that band and their music bring back a lot of memories for me. My best friend, Tamra and I did so many things while listening to them, we saw them in concert a few times as well. It's like the end of an era. Anyway, a lot of the thoughts I had about this at the time have kind of faded because I waited too long to post more than just that. At any rate, better late than never to say "Peter Steele, you will be missed in the world of music and our memories will always honor you."

We had a little going on in Memphis last week too when we paused to remember Dr. Benjamin Hooks, well known, historic Civil Rights Leader, father and native Memphian. He accomplished many things in his time, and had a long life too.

The fact is, there is a time and place for every one of the human beings here on earth to shed their skin (so-to-speak), and transform into their true form, their souls go on to ascend to something so much more profound. It's sad that we are bound by such linear thought and gagged by grief. Grief is a natural human emotion, and one that is understandable and also honored. Everyone does this in their own way. We can't help but miss those who have passed on who were loved or important to us.

It's just a part of life much as quoted by "Forrest Gump", and is something we don't fully understand, not in the way we understand the reality we are swimming in this go-round. :)

Truth is that everyone we love and have 'lost' simply changed, they didn't leave us forever... they're right here with us, all around us, and they're a part of us for eternity.

Sometimes we just have to lift the veil of grief, ignorance or confusion and realize that there's a much bigger picture that we can be a part of if we just open our eyes and our hearts.

Have a wonderful week...

Love, AJ

I Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

2010-04-14T15:01:00.004-03:00

Allow me to bend your eyes, bend your mind for a few. Stop what you're doing and take this opportunity for a little mental "getaway" courtesy of me, AJ.

Getting away for a few rare moments of solitude is an almost daily "must" for me. I know some days you feel as though you are too busy to put down what you are doing and step away; but I promise you that if you can just manage 10, 15 minutes as a gift to yourself you will come back with renewed energy and focus.

When kicking back in search of Nirvana, I always take my shoes off. Being barefoot in the grass (as long as you mind where you step), is one of the most soul-refreshing things you can do.

Get back to Earth too. One of my favorite things to do on a beautiful day, is grab a quilt and lay out in the middle of the pasture. Just being caressed by the sun and breeze, hearing the sounds of nature and feeling the strength of the Earth underneath you can ground you and leave you with peace.

Even if you don't have a pasture, there's always a park or even your own bed or other quiet spot. You can turn off all of the electronics, gadgets and noise and just "be". There are CDs of nature too, so try it.

Today, as a reward for meeting some deadlines, I am sitting at the park in my car with the windows rolled down, radio off and taking in the sounds of the birds, leaves rustling in the slight breeze and imagining I am some place away from it all.

Aside from the crazy kids screaming and playing nearby on the jungle gym, and the psycho ice cream man trolling through playing his psychotic bell version of "It's a Small World", I am proud to say that I have relaxed enough to bring my potential body count down to at least 50 today. (I jest)

So you see, this relaxation thing really benefits us all.

Wishing you the utmost in serenity, or at least the tools and the cool calculation you need to deal with all the rest. ;-).

Absence and Gassy Girl

2010-04-13T22:08:00.003-03:00

So I have been away from blogging for a few days. The weather's been nice, but that's not what kept me away. It's really just the hectic few days I've had. Quite a few things I've had to finish up, and work deadlines, so there haven't been that many moments of solitude in which I could reflect and find anything nice to post.

I do miss blogging when I am away, or when I don't get a chance to write. Not that I have many who miss reading my gibberish, but I guess it works either way. I write what I can when I can. So I will try to reflect and make notes and get a few thoughts out.

Lately I have been thinking about a lot of things, but just not having the time to focus and write in the way I would like to. I will try to get around to my blog-hood and visit you all shortly. For now, here is a video that I am obsessed with, for some reason. It isn't the farting, it is more the theme song and the dance that I find so amusing. I like the plot, it's funny to me.

This is very short, so check it out. Am I crazy for digging this?? Haha!

"Gassy Girl"

Rotten Eggs

2010-04-02T16:36:00.000-03:00

Easter Weekend is here, it's hard to believe. I feel like we just went through New Years and into 2010. Of course time is flying by like it always does. So Friday... yep, "Good Friday" and we are looking down the barrel of a long holiday weekend, and I'm happy about that.

I haven't written much lately because at first of course, I had the horrible cold and felt like crap, and then this week started out fine, but I jarred my back when I hit a bump on my bike, but am trying not to complain too much, so I won't go on and on. Just know that I have not been very comfortable. I'm working through it.

Lately I have been noticing a few things of course that annoy me. Some of these things are the same old tried and true "bad drivers" and "rude employees", but I am really aiming at the Burger King commercials specifically. The latest one I have not actually watched because I have Tivo and I fast-forward through it, but even on FFWD the thing still annoys me because it basically ends with the Burger King Dude riding a sport bike. I want to pull an "Elvis" and shoot the television.

Yes, I know I have the choice to look away, right?? I don't know why I am compelled to look yet despise the Burger King Dude... come on, I know there is a growing population of BKD haters!! :)

Interruptions caused me delay in finishing up of this post, so on we go:

Mom's birthday was Friday (4/2), so we spent the night there, watched a couple movies and visited. Got up this morning, had some coffee and oatmeal, and then got attacked by Mom's cat, "Marty". He got pissed off at me for some reason, and nearly took a hunk out of my arm. Marty has always been wild, he's not a domesticated cat, but the son of a stray that was also born of a stray. He's feral, but a good cat, and Mom loves him. He usually doesn't get mad at me, but I spatted him on the hip for acting like he was going to bite, then I guess it escalated. So I have a big row of teeth marks on my arm, and it looks like it's going to bruise.

Mom's house... yeah, normally I spend the night before Easter and dye eggs, which was a big thing for my Dad and me actually, so I am a bit depressed off dying eggs these days. I just can't seem to find the inspiration to do it, it's not fun anymore, not without Daddy. That isn't what stopped me from spending the night tonight at Mom's though, it was just that Richie had already begged me to go with him to see the MMA fights for the guys he has been training with. We went to Tunica to see them, and it was quite fun. I was glad I went to support him and hang out. Afterward, we grabbed a bite to eat.

An interesting thing I saw there was one of the other teams sported shirts that said "Jesus Didn't Tap Out" (the T on Tap was the cross). Well of COURSE Jesus didn't tap out, the man had his hands nailed up, so I am kind of inclined to think it doesn't count. I bet he really would have wanted to tap out if his hands were free, and of course if "Tapping Out" had been invented by that time. So, uhhh shirts not so genius guys.

So anyroad, tomorrow is actually Easter Sunday, and since things have changed so drastically, I'm not sure it is anything to write home about, but I will be there for a while for my Mom. I wish all the time I could find ways to make things happier for her, but nothing seems to do the trick. I don't know what to do, and I find myself most helpless, unable to make a difference where usually I am always able to make people feel better. I wish I wish...

I must move from that subject right now to something the rest of you may or may not be privy to. Usually, I am one of the last people to read a news article, or find out something funny or kooky about a celebrity, which is disappointing because I enjoy telling others about interesting things, but it kind of bums me out when I try to tell it and you've all seen it months before. Nonetheless, I have to briefly blog about this.

My besty and I were having a discussion recently about Vincent Gallo, just because she had re-watched "Buffalo 66" and then just got interested in some of his projects. After all, he is a very interesting celeb, quite the strange guy, but in my opinion he is quite creative and very eclectic. Just an all-around 'artist' type personality. When I was nosing around the site (linked above) on his website, I was looking through the art and photo prints, merchandise and the like, and I happened to stumble across a link to "personal services".

Maybe you should check it out before going forward with the post.

Apparently, you can have him for a fantasy evening or weekend, as long as you are a 'naturally born female', and EVEN POSSIBLY obtain his sperm for the purpose of having a child that would be predisposed to his brilliance (except you can't use his surname)... IF THE PRICE IS RIGHT.

I read it and I know that he has a strange and funny side, yet something about all this makes me believe he is serious... but IS he SERIOUS?? It's a bit mad, but he is not an ordinary guy, not by any means... I just don't know. Read it and you be the judge.

That about wraps it up, I suppose. I was interrupted about 6 different times from Richie (a.k.a. Mr. J) wanting me to watch a clip on T.V., then allow him to show me a couple of different Jiu Jitsu maneuvers, which always hurts me because it's rough, and I don't know anything about it and am uncomfortable being flipped around and just don't like it. He doesn't "get it" and ends up resenting the fact that I don't like him to put me in these holds... Who could blame me?

But that plus a few other delays caused this entry more delay than it should have. It's an empty, rambling entry and on a normal day might have taken me 10 minutes tops.

Oh joy to the rotten eggs of life. Happy Easter Y'all.

Had to laugh at this one.

Just a few Easter funnies, some of them never get old... ;)

Have A Great Weekend. ~AJ

This, That or The Other

2010-03-24T18:07:00.002-03:00

How about a few 'down to earth' type updates, just the daily 411. The changes in the weather seem to have taken their toll on my sinuses today, I've been trying to keep it clear to no avail. Hopefully that's all it is, a few minor sinus problems rearing their ugly heads :) Other than that, I've just been really busy at work and trying to stay afloat in the other areas of my life, trying to stay motivated enough to maintain some semblance of a workout schedule. Then of course Taxes have been a major pain again this year, but hopefully that will resolve o.k. Just gotta do what we gotta do sometimes.

I still try to find a few minutes each day to enjoy some relaxing quiet time, to stay grounded and relieve some of the stress.

Last night we made eggplant Parmesan (healthy version). What I mean by that is that we try to put better ingredients in it and watch the sodium content. You have to look for hidden evils in the stupid ingredient lists sometimes on food, like "modified wheat flour" - basically equals MSG, and anything Hydrogenated equals trans fat, and of course the high fructose corn syrup... They put some sneaky stuff in there sometimes. The only way to get free of the rotten game is to "grow your own". That would be nice, I guess but some of us are not lucky enough to have a 'green thumb' or the time that it takes to do everything yourself. It would be fantastic, believe me I wish I was that way... But I can't do it all.

Looking back, I believe my parents could always do anything, they had a garden, Mom can sew anything and quilt and all, Dad was able to do anything in the world with his two wise hands, build shelves, machinery, do auto work, fix things... but I'm just ME... and that's very limited. What will I do in an emergency or if I ever needed to? I just think of that sometimes. None of us are perfect I know, and I tend to overthink things sometimes.

Musically, and memory-wise I have been slipping back in time again, wishing for simple sweet days when I felt safe and knew everything was going to be alright. It's hard to hang on to that as an adult sometimes. I miss my Daddy, I wish I could call him up on the phone and just talk to him and hear his voice. It never gets easier, it might numb for a few days, or weeks, but something always reminds us and the scab gets scratched off and we bleed a little more. Blood, sweat, tears... and then back to music huh. ;)

So today I have been remembering a movie that Billy Crystal produced entitled "*61" about the 1961 New York Yankees season wherein Roger Maris and Mickey Mantle both vied for the Babe Ruth Record. I have included part 1 below, and if you ever feel like a good 'baseball movie' then watch it.

I think Billy Crystal did a good job with the film. I guess in some small way the baseball history reminds me of Dad too, even though he wasn't a player, and not a huge fan, I think of the St. Louis Cardinals... Daddy was from Missouri, and we spent some time visiting St. Louis with family when we could. We have some good memories... It all ties together somehow I suppose... it just does.

That's about it for me today, just a few misty words and silly reminders. Hope all is well in your neck of the woods. Enjoy the rest of your week! -AJ

Justin's Country Roots

2010-03-23T18:02:00.005-03:00

A rare look at early Justin Timberlake. Well, I can't help him out here at all, but in his defense I guess you could say he may be 10 or 11. Still, don't you just want to roll on the floor laughing?? You GO Justin!!! ;)

What Time Is it?!

2010-03-22T12:05:00.013-03:00

[Parental Warning - Mature Content I Suppose]

Ok, I decided to 'get cracking' on another installment of this because I enjoyed writing about songs in my playlist and why I chose them so much. If you want, you can read the first part below from 3/20. Otherwise, let's get this party started.

Today's Random Ten! Ooh look it starts with a really good one:

1. Little Wing - Jimi Hendrix

My love affair with Jimi Hendrix and his music began long ago. There has always been something haunting to me in his words, his enchanting chords and just to look at his facial expression in the photos that have been around since he's been gone. "Little Wing" began as my special song, once again because of "Z". We would be riding a back road late at night, holding hands and Z would look at me and just say, "Butterflies and Zebras and Moonbeams" and smile that smile. One night as we left work for one of our late-night back road ventures, he handed me a version done by Sting. He told me that when he listened to Sting, it made him want to be a bad boy and turn his hat backwards lol. Then when I met my husband, astonishingly it was his favorite song too and I discovered we both had a Hendrix fetish.

I can't deny this song and its hold on my life.

2. Tom's Diner - Suzanne Vega

Wow, Tom's Diner... that really takes me back. This song was written in 1981 by Suzanne Vega (I'm sure everyone at least vaguely recalls her). However, it was not released until 1991, ten years later. It was originally a capella, but they released a version of it that had music behind it. I remember both. I know, I know that doesn't answer why I have it my playlist, does it? Well, to be honest, it was just a song frequented by myself and two of my Floridian friends, Amy and James. It reminds me a bit of relaxing, rainy days.

We'd play it a lot (especially James) whenever we were hanging out, riding around shopping or what have you. That is, before they off and moved back to Florida to live Happily Ever After. So far so good Amy and James!! This one is for you guys.

3. Easy - Faith No More

Easy? Well this one is Easy indeed. Originally recorded by Lionel Richie, this fantastic "remake" done by Faith No More is one of my favorites. The song itself has always been a favorite, even the Richie version. Though you can hear distinct differences in the versions, Mike Patton made such a spot-on marvelous job on this tune. It's at the top of my sing-along sensations.

4. Jungle Love - Morris Day and The Time

Picture it, awkward girl too shy for words, wearing a hideous outfit from the 80s... nobody ever asks her to dance, but when the DJ cranks up and everyone hits the floor at the high school dance, who is she to resist the magic of Morris Day and The 'M!#&*%!n' Time as they jammed "Jungle Love"? Fast-forward to modern day Memphis, Tennessee as we see this same sweet, (slightly older) shy girl on the busy weekday Interstate, bobbing her head, and singing along to the same song, can you tell me... "What Time Is It?!?!!"

5. You Might Think I'm Crazy - The Cars

The Cars have long been a favorite of mine. Many of their songs take me back to my good times with my Sister Vickie and nieces, and even to the days when I used to force the sleepyheads to sit up and watch "Friday Night Videos" with me. "You Might Think I'm Crazy" reminds me of a simpler time of accompanying my sis on downtown Memphis errands, of the Green Thunderbird with the white leather seats, our legs sticking to them in the hot summer humidity. Riding around, attending softball games, the wind blowing through our hair as the smell of "Oscar de la renta" perfume permeated our olfactory systems, we sighed with the glee of freedom and childhood.

6. Goddamn - Hellyeah

Here we switch from the innocence of youth to the dirty sounds of more modern metal. These guys are one of my more recent digs. Although they began more around 2001, most of their notoriety came about 2006-2007. Vinnie Paul (Dimebag's brother and drummer from Pantera), and the other guys came from Damageplan, Mudvayne and Nothingface (but I won't punish them for the Mudvayne thing). The act is original, the sound is fresh with a familiar feel, and the groove is heavy and in your face.

I listen in when I feel like kicking someone in the teeth. ;)

Check it Out!

7. I'm Broken - Pantera

Pantera is close to my heart always, and I can listen to them virtually anytime. I'll probably always ache for the good ol' days before the death of legendary guitarist Dimebag Darrell.

Still, we have Pantera's music to remember him by, along with a host of other gifts that he left us.

"I'm Broken" is one of my favorite songs, and as such must be included in my playlist to jam on whenever I get sick of kicking people in the teeth and need to simply smash their faces in. (I jest, slightly)

8. Take A Picture - Filter

Filter has always been a group that I enjoyed quite a lot. Their notorious 1995 hit "Hey Man, Nice Shot", a reaction to the well-documented public suicide of Pennsylvania state treasurer Budd Dwyer, who shot himself during a press conference with a .357 Magnum was something in itself. It just isn't one I want to listen to on rotation. Yes, "Take A Picture" is another feel-good song for me, even though it doesn't link to a particular memory. I was reminded of the song and the band when I watched the 2004 film "The Girl Next Door" (starring Elisha Cuthbert). It was used in the soundtrack, and has been on my playlist somewhere ever since.

9. Missing You - Mary J. Blige

Mary J is one of my favorite R&B Singers, and this song writes home regarding the heartbreaking feeling of missing anybody you love or miss in your life. She pulls at the soul strings, and you can't help but sing along. I can be a Diva for the 4:16 that this song is jamming through my speakers, because I am gonna be singing along, no doubt.

10. Cowboy Song - Thin Lizzy

I Love Thin Lizzy, and I wish Phil Lynott (the bass player and Lead Singer) had made it to present day. Unfortunately, many of these so-well-loved music geniuses check out way before their time. Maybe they can't take the pressures that come with stardom, or maybe they were just too beautiful for this world. One can only speculate.

"Cowboy Song" always gives my heart a little "tug", and reminds me of days when I worked at R.R. Donnelley back home. That's when I really started digging into the Thin Lizzy music, and it's been part of my soul ever since. Rock on Phil Lynott, wherever you are out there in the cosmos... I know you are!

They Write The Songs

2010-03-21T02:30:00.009-03:00

As I was sitting here feeling like writing something but not quite sure where to start, I came up with a little idea. I thought that I would go to my My Playlist.com Playlist, the one entitled "Jaxxx's Boombox" (it's actually on the blog way down, bottom left if you ever feel like jamming it). My idea was just to hit "random" and do an explanation of ten of the songs and why they exist on my playlist. This has the potential to drum up some memories or interesting stories.

I'm totally going to play it fair and really do the first 10 randoms that pop up, so it may or may not prove interesting, I am going to roll the dice and see what we get though.

This isn't a "Meme" at all, but if you want to do something similar, why not. It could give you a creative spurt or bring back some interesting memories for you. Go for it.

Ten Random Songs on Jaxxx's Boombox and Why!

1. Drop Dead Legs - Van Halen

This song takes me way, way back. Although it is not a very interesting story, it was a "feel good song" for me. I remember hanging out at the Good Ol' Mall Of Memphis way before it was demolished of course, hearing it blaring out from the Ice Chalet. That moment was suspended in my memory. When I hear "Drop Dead Legs", I just rewind for a few minutes and feel that slight chill once again, as if I was sitting at the food court overlooking the ice skaters, or a spring day on campus when I might blare the song in my car and just breathe deep and sigh.

2. Thuggish Ruggish Bone - Bone Thugs-N-Harmony

There was a CD I had back in the mid-late 90s that had a variety of R&B Hip Hop favorites on it. One of those songs was "Thuggish Ruggish Bone". I liked the groove, I like the Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, and it just brings back some good memories for me having countless cups of coffee at the Truck Stop in the middle of the night, then going for breakfast at the Casino... of fun friends like Kenneth (one of the coffee friends). He liked me, wanted to go out with me. So for our first "date" I forced him to go see "To Wong Foo", which if you remember was one of those movies that a straight man might cringe through. However, he was a trooper and made it through, only saying a comment or two like "If they kiss I'mma get sick!!!" Good times. Good times. I did Kenneth wrong, I sort of had him in the friend zone, but still I was conflicted and from time to time I would hook up with him. He was a really good guy. Kenneth, I'm sorry for taking your friendship and your admiration for granted. You didn't deserve it.

3. Bomber - Motorhead

Come on kids... it's Motorhead! It really needs no further explanation. First you just have to love the name Motorhead, and secondly they're one of the most rockin bands ever.

Who remembers this gem?

[Chazz and Rex are testing Chris]
Chazz: Who'd win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?
Chris Moore: Lemmy.
[Rex imitates a game show buzzer]
Chris Moore: ... God?
Rex: Wrong, dickhead, trick question. Lemmy *IS* God.

Bomber is just one of those songs that makes you wanna drive fast and do dangerous things. Besides a band that comes on stage and just says "We are Motörhead and we're gonna kick your ass!!" is Rock and Roll forever to me.

4. Clouds - Chaka Khan

For one, I Lovvvee Chaka Khan-Hey I always told you I was extremely eclectic. Further, I loved this song since I was a teenager and would go out on the front porch of my childhood home (Mom and Dad's house), and play my music while I lay out on the lawn on a quilt watching clouds, sunbathing, and trying my hand at getting tan. The tanning never quite worked out for me, but I gained a great appreciation for Clouds (the song AND the real deal), and even today nothing quite marvels me like watching clouds roll by on a beautiful warm day, finding treasures and mysteries lost for ages in those mysterious magical creatures. Roll on.

5. Dead Flowers - Towns Van Zandt

This is a simple one. I chose this version because I am an absolute lover of a little movie we all know as "The Big Lebowski". If you are not familiar with this movie then I assume you are totally out of your element, and don't even know what it means to abide. Do yourself a favor and rent or BUY it for your collection NOW.

Although Dead Flowers is a Rolling Stones song (written by Jagger and Richards), and one I love very much, I have a partiality to the Van Zandt version because it is part of the phenomenon that IS the Big Lebowski. That movie, while not only one of the funniest I have ever seen, holds a special place in my heart as well because my Husband and I used to fall asleep to it almost every night for a long time.

Well when you're sitting there in your silk upholstered chair
Talking to some rich folk that you know
Well I hope you won't see me in my ragged company
Cause you know I could never be alone

Take me down little Susie, take me down
I know you think you're the queen of the underground
And you can send me dead flowers every morning
Send me dead flowers by the mail
Send me dead flowers to my wedding And
I won't forget to put roses on your grave

6. Vicious - Lou Reed

Lou Reed is one of my favorite New York Musicians and I admire him for many reasons. To me, he is one of those great song writers. As well, I am also an artist and since he was affiliated with Andy Warhol, hey bonus. This song actually was influenced a lot by Andy Warhol, so it's the best of both worlds. I like the sound, the beat and the general viciousness of it all. ;)

7. Piece of My Love - Guy

Ooh this one digs in a little deep. "Piece of My Love" by Guy (some of the 'guys' who went on to form "Blackstreet") is special to me because it is one of those make-out songs from my Time With Z (a.k.a. Butterflies, Zebras Moonbeams). We had a lot of special songs together, and each one of them has the capacity to bring back those warm feelings and memories... that lost electric fire. Things like that never quite fade completely. When I think of all the wonderful feelings I have experienced through music and the souls I have shared love and laughter with, I am a very lucky woman. That one's for you Z.

8. Boys of Summer - Don Henley

This one is from the dusty archives too. I remember listening to it as I was getting ready for the first day of school after summer break. The chords in this song, the words, the mood- just gives me a fuzzy, dreamy feeling that honestly brings a little melancholy tear just from hearing it. I never get tired of the song, and it always makes me picture riding to a lake, seeing sunsets, and feeling the electric infatuation of youth. My love for this song truly will be strong after the boys of summer are long gone... Thanks Don! :)

9. Kiss My Ass Goodbye - 7 Year Bitch

7 Year Bitch was one of the coolest girl bands ever, one of my favorites. I have this song in my list because my best friend Tamra and I used to blare this band, as well as L7, White Zombie, and many other hardcore and rockin tunes to our fun-filled trips to the mall, out to eat, and to all of our wild and wondrous adventures. The song quite frankly is one of my only ways of "being near" my best friend that I never get to see, and miss so very much. That one's for Tamra!

10. Alive and Kicking - Simple Minds

Three things: Eighties, John Hughes Films and Youthful Innocence. Anytime I hear this song I want to go pull out my Sixteen Candles and Breakfast Club movies and just veg out with cocoa and I also want to hang out with my Sister, Vickie who's house was usually the place I watched all of these. I miss the good old days very much. Those songs don't help matters. ha-ha.

Ok, that wraps up the random 10 from my boombox. It was so much fun doing it--I might have to put up a sequel. Hell, I have plenty of songs to go through, so stay tuned!